Employment jokes
Why did the dwarf get a job at Lidl?
Because every Lidl helps.
Why can't orphans work at S. C. Johnson?
Because it's a family company.
When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.
Did you hear the one about the Polish elevator operator? He was fired because he couldn't learn the route.
A fully grown bull Great White Shark is 15 feet long and can open its jaws up to 1.2 meters long. It could eat a small child in seconds. Anyways, I lost my job at the aquarium...
I have so many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.
If wishes were horses, Beggars would ride.
If turnips were watches, I would wear one by my side.
And if if's and an's were pots and pans, The tinker would never work!
Why can't orphans work at SC Johnson?...
Because it's a FAMILY company.
Where do mermaids get a job?
At the kelp wanted station.
What’s the difference between a job and a wife?
The job keeps sucking after 5 years.
Why did the female dicktator get fired? She had too much dick!
After a week of this, she can't stand it any longer.
The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why.
My ex got hit by a bus yesterday. I nearly lost my job.
Hi, I got fired. Oh, don't know which fire? Oh, the one that I got burned on, the volcano.
What is a suicidal horny person's job?
A butcher.
I lost my job at the bank today. A lady told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
I saw an orphan crying the other day, so I asked, "Where are your parents?"
God, I love working at an orphanage :)
How to get 60 Translink workers? Please head out of the pool because ya'll are fat. Oh wait, didn't you poop yourself? Say sorry to your underwear while pooping as a fat Canadian Translink worker, little boy.
I saw a kid crying. I asked him what's wrong, where are your parents? They paused and looked at me funny... GOD I LOVE WORKING AT AN ORPHANAGE.
Why can't orphans work at SC Johnson?
Because it's a family company.