Election Jokes

Voting for Hillary because of her political experience is like...

Hiring Hitler as a birthday magician because he made 6,000,000 people disappear.

Imagine if Joe Biden was elected for a second term.

He would be the first president to be assassinated by a slick bathtub.

Hillary Clinton could be the first F president ever elected into office.

Sorry, it was supposed to say "Female," but the "emale" got deleted.

Voting is like doing a group project in school.

I did my part, but I’m worried the rest of you are going to fuck this up.

hillary for president

The top panel shows a group of people sitting at a round table. The text overlay reads, "Americans holding a presidential election every 4 years since 1788." The bottom panel shows a chaotic scene of people in disarray. The text reads, "France going from monarchy to directory to consul to emperor back to monarchy to republic back to emperor to three more different republics in the same time."

Whats the difference between a five year old and and a Democrat.... The five year old doesnt expect you to do everything for them. (Vote for Ted Cruz, Ben Sahapiro 2020)

Donald Trump announced he will run for prez today. His hair will on Friday.

Politics.

Biden: Shut up, Trump, disrespectful!

President: You are the one with the inappropriate hair touching, bro. 😎😎😎😎😎😎

Biden: -laughs hard because sloppy Joe can't do anything.

Trump goes to a bar and sees Hillary Clinton. He goes up to her and says, "Buy me a drink." She replies angrily, "Get your own drinks. What kind of a man asks a woman to buy him a drink?" Trump responds, "The kind that will grab you by the p***y."

Vote Biden or Trump, I like neither, but I want to know what the world would say. (Don't judge other people.)

What do you call a Democrat that is a progressive?

A Democrat that lost in a presidential election.

Hey any riding with Biden fans out there?

I ran out of gas and could really use a ride so if one of ya'll can call me and pick me up that'd be great and I can't get gas because I only have 20 bucks which is like 1-5 and a half, help me please.