Eating jokes

What do you call a rapper's favorite place to eat?

The MIC Donald's drive-thru.

You couldn't spit out a good sentence, even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.

WOULD YOU RATHER:

Eat 20 lbs of cow s**t?

or

Drink a gallon of sperm?

So a guy named Nathaniel just came home, and when he enters his sister’s room, he sees her f***ing a piece of broccoli. And Nathaniel says, “Abbie, what’s wrong with you? I was going to eat that later, and now it smells like broccoli!”

"Curry muncher!"

I saw a Black person riding a bike, so I ran back to my garage. He was still eating.

Say "I hop in this:".

I made you eat your peas! 🤦

What do you get when you eat a hamburger?

Mustard gas.

Jay and Andrew are best friends who are almost alike. The difference between them both is Jay is poor and well... Andrew, on the other hand, is suck-a-dick poor. Let me explain, Jay wakes up in his room, walks to the kitchen, and asks his mom, Lisa (I call her Lisa now, btw), if there is anything to eat. "No, bitch!" she replies, so Jay drinks a glass of milk and goes back to bed.

Now Andrew... wakes up, jumps out of bed, and he's in the kitchen. He sees his mom fixing some food for work after a long hard night of giving her husband blue balls. "Anything left for me, Mother?" Andrew asks. "Sorry, Honey, I have to eat to put food on the table and to get the running again." *so she goes to work, taking her time* Andrew sits by his bedside and says to himself, "Man... I'd suck a dick for some water right now." *his mom storms back after hearing what he had said* "I'll buy you a soda if you do my first customer for me!"

Why did the Indian man eat a cow? Because he wanted to be fat.

"F***, Jesus ate his stinky ass."

What do squirrels eat at the fair? A-corn dog.

People are like bean burritos. You can eat them EVERY DAY, but you'll never run out.

What did the banana say to the vibrator?

"Why are you shaking? She's gonna eat me later!"

What’s the difference between a bird and a human?

“We don’t eat with our peckers.”

I have an addiction to cheddar cheese, but it's only mild.

What do you call a fat bitch that eats cum from used condoms? Your mom!

Q: What did the cannibal say to the leper?

A: You gonna eat that?

It’s amazing just how paranoid Hitler was.

In Hitler’s Germany, it was illegal to make jokes about him or his regime.

Come on! Forbidding Germans from making jokes? Isn’t that a bit like forbidding Americans from eating salad?

Q: What's the best way to eat a squirrel?

A: Open up its little legs.