Eating jokes
What does Jonathan Davis eat for breakfast?
Korn Flakes.
What is a cannibal's favorite dessert?
Brownies.
Isn't eating a clock time-consuming?
Don’t like this post, or else I will go to your house and eat you! 😈
What do cannibals call a wheelchair user?
"Uber Eats."
Memes
I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.
Chalie has an eating disorder, and he is shorter, so is his life, but he will never get a wife. He's a gay motherfucker who wants to be hit by a trucker?
In the cute fantasies: "Est-ce que tu manges du poulet? Attendez une seconde, VOTRE PROFESSEUR VEGAN!!!!!"
In reality: "Are you eating chicken? Wait a second, YOUR THE VEGAN TEACHER!!!"
I'm gonna eat a hell of a lot of popcorn kernels before I die just to make the cremation a little more interesting.
Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom, I checked inside her ham sandwich, and there were fresh drugs.
OK, OK, eat your shirt.
If you wanna get fat, what's the quickest way to do it?
Eat two jars of mayo each day, and in about a month, your scale will have your phone number!
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
"What are you shaking for? She’s going to eat me!"
Why should old women never eat seafood?
'Cause then she'll start acting crabby.
Why does Mario eat mushrooms?
Because he's a very fungi!
What's the difference between a baby and putty?
You can only eat one.
Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to eat Eminem. 🎤😎
If I were to not eat the last biscuit, I would feel "crumby."
What is the difference between a small child and a watermelon?
One I eat on the daily and the other is a watermelon.
Mom: Please eat, baby!
Baby: No!
Mom: Here comes the airplane!