Eating jokes
When you can’t have Chinese food because you don’t have any pets,
just eat African food, you have plenty of neighbors!
Isn't eating a clock time-consuming?
What is a cannibal's favorite dessert?
Brownies.
What does Jonathan Davis eat for breakfast?
Korn Flakes.
Why can't fat kids change a tire?
They would eat the donut.
What does Michael Jackson say when it gets hot?
He-he-eat!
What did Michael Jackson say when dinner was ready? Ea-ea-eat.
"Curry muncher!"
A panda walks into a restaurant, orders some food, and eats it. Once he was done, he shoots the waiter, then leaves.
Police and detectives arrive at the scene. They ask the waiter, "Who did this to you? What happened?"
The waiter replies, "A panda, eats, shoots, and leaves."
Mom: Please eat, baby!
Baby: No!
Mom: Here comes the airplane!
What's black and eats Kitty?
Serval cancer.
Son: What's for dinner tonight?
Mom: Steak!
Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?
Mom: HUNGER!
In the cute fantasies: "Est-ce que tu manges du poulet? Attendez une seconde, VOTRE PROFESSEUR VEGAN!!!!!"
In reality: "Are you eating chicken? Wait a second, YOUR THE VEGAN TEACHER!!!"
Don’t like this post, or else I will go to your house and eat you! 😈
I'm gonna eat a hell of a lot of popcorn kernels before I die just to make the cremation a little more interesting.
Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom, I checked inside her ham sandwich, and there were fresh drugs.
Chalie has an eating disorder, and he is shorter, so is his life, but he will never get a wife. He's a gay motherfucker who wants to be hit by a trucker?
I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.
What is the difference between a small child and a watermelon?
One I eat on the daily and the other is a watermelon.
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
"What are you shaking for? She’s going to eat me!"