Eating jokes

I asked my girlfriend what she wanted to eat, she said nothing. So I brought her to Africa.

How did the cheetah greet other animals?

Cheetah: "Nice to eat you."

Your legs are just like Oreos! I wanna split the ends and eat what's in between.

Recently I visited a restaurant in Crotone. When I was done eating, I told the waitress I was “Penaldo” with my food. She instantly knew that I was finished with my food.

Why didn't the cows eat the lemon grass?

It made sour milk.

What can Michael Jackson eat in his coffin?

Nothing, only brown bread, what they call it! 😂😂😂

Why did Jeffery Dahmer not eat old people?

He does not like roasted vegetables.

Why do orphans eat an ice cream cone?? They can't afford a family pack.

Why did the student cannibal rush to the cafeteria?

He wanted to eat ahead of the others.

Gf: Hi.

Bf: Hi.

Gf: Did you eat yet?

Bf: Did you eat yet?

Gf: Are you copying me?

Bf: Are you coping me??

Gf: I love you.

Bf: Yeah, I ate already.

I'm always willing to go down on a handicapped girl.

Momma always told me to eat my vegetables.

Why do women like Pac-Man so much?

How else can you get eaten three times for a quarter?

Q: Why should you never invite an aardvark to your family reunion?

A: Because it will eat your "aunts."

There were four men eating dinner on the Titanic when it hit the iceberg.

The waiter said, "We have to get to the lifeboats!"

The teacher said, "What about the kids?"

The lawyer said, "Fuck the kids."

The priest said, "Do you think we'll have time?"

What can you serve but never eat? A volleyball.

What do mice eat for dinner?

Mac n Cheese.

What's the difference between pussy and pizza... nothing because I'll eat them both.

Man goes to the doctor. He has a banana sticking out of one ear, a carrot sticking out of the other ear, and a green bean sticking out of one nostril.

"Doctor, I'm not feeling well," the man complains.

"Well, it's no wonder," the doctor replies. "You're not eating right!"

Last time I ate a vegetable, I got banned from my sister's group home.

How do fish get high?

Because they eat seaweed.