Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.
Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronising her, claim she knew how to do it anyway and that even if she didn’t, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.
doctor: you need to eat healthy
me: no
doctor: the last patient who didn't change their diet after i suggested it died
me: oh my goodness
doctor: in a plane crash
me: that sounds unrelated
doctor: i'm the one that crashed it. do not disobey me
Yo mama so fat, I saw her eat with 3 utensils : A spoon, a knife, and a FORKLIFT
What do you call a banana eating a banana?
Canabananalism
A girl asks her Asian boyfriend if he wants to eat her pussy. He asks her why she is taking off her clothes, instead of cooking her cat.
When I was a boy, I had a disease that required me to eat dirt three times a day in order to survive... It's a good thing my older brother told me about it.
Q:What did the cannibal say to the leper?
A:You gonna eat that?
Q: whats a pedophiles favorite place to eat? A: schools because there is a wide variety of choices.
why dont cannibals eat clowns
because they taste funny
I'm on sea- food diet, I see food and eat it.
A fully grown bull Great White Shark is 15 feet long and can open its jaws open up to 1.2 meters long. It could eat a small child in seconds. Anyways, I lost my job at the aquarium...
What do you call a cow eating grass? - A Lawn Moo-er
What do lesbian cook for dinner They don't they just eat out
REALLY CRAPPY JOKE ALERT!!! oh quin how was eating that tight butt must be nasty i heard u met from rear ending him
Friend 1. whats your favorite drink or food Friend 2. pizza Friend 3. Donuts Friend 4. i don't eat food but i do drink bleach Friend 1. (calling the suicide hotline) Friend 2. (Calling the parents)
Every culture has weird food.
Australians eat vegemite. The British eat haggis. The French eat snails. The Chinese eat dogs. The Americans eat their young siblings' private parts.
What do you call a Lesbian Dinosaur? A Eat-a-lot-of-pus
A cocksucker is still a cocksucker if a cocksucker only sucks for moal,religious, or health reasons, and a vegetarian who doesn't eat meat for moral,religious or health reasons can still be a cocksucker so how can a cocksucker be a vegetarian for moral, religious, or health reasons
Me (an adult) with my girl going to a nice restaurant I asked the waiter "People under 12 eat free right" the water confirmed that yes people under 12 eat free, then my girlfriend said, "but I'm 13.
What do most disabled people eat there arm
