Dont jokes
Don't flirt when there is Life Alert!
Edna: Hey there big boy!
Big boy: You need to stop doing this.
"Hippity hoppity, don't abolish my property!"
A man went to the doctor, and the doctor said, "What happened to you?"
The man replied and said, "I broke my arm in two places!"
Then the doctor replied with, "DON’T GO BACK TO THOSE TWO PLACES!!"
Your mom is so ugly when she tried to enter the ugly contest, they said they don't allow professionals.
What do orgasms and impulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
The daughter walks up to her father and asks him, "Dad, can I ask you something?"
The father says, "Of course, what's your question?"
The daughter replies and asks, "How do you feel about abortion?"
The father says, "Why don't you ask your sister?"
The daughter replies, "I don't have a sis-"
I went to visit my friend who is a stand up comedian and I asked him, "Why do you have so much art supplies, clothing fabrics, and building supplies in your basement?"
He responded with, "I don't know what it is people think I need it all for, but almost every time I perform, people tell me I need new material!"
"Don't forget you are what you eat," said one person. "Then I should eat a skinny person!" said the other.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know what a home looks like.
Why are Mexican families so big?
They don’t know how to put a condom on.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...
It don't moan when u put milk inside.
Can we have sex, because if we don't, I can't like you, big, thick booty!
So let's have sex in bed, you sexy woman, or behind a tree, because shoving my dick in your pussy is a very nice feeling while sucking your ass.
The man had no arms and a little girl came over and said, "Give me a high-five."
He said, "I’ve got no arms," and the girl said, "Are you an eel? Cause he don’t have arms."
Why can't Paris play chess? Because they don't have their towers (also known as rooks).
Why You should never poop on the floor in an Apple Store?
Because they don't have Windows. 🤢 🤣
Why are Black women dating white men?
So their kids don’t have to worry about not meeting their father.
How can you tell if a man is straight? You don't have to, he will tell you.
Why do girls rub their eyes after they wake up in the morning? because they don't have balls to scratch.
You have a problem with jokes about dementia? That's funny, I don't remember asking.
Why don't you act like an amoeba and split?