DOE jokes
What does LGBTQ+ mean? Is it the premium version of GAY?
What does NASA say when they don’t want to go in space: Never Access Space Again.
What does Madeleine McCann and my old Xbox have in common?
They both died with red rings.
Who does an orphan play soccer with?
No one.
Little Johnny fucked a girl, ran away, fucked another, ran, went to the strip club, got a private dance, he has sex with them, fucking ran, yelled to some random bitch ass guy, "Fuck him, he's a bitch." He bends down, they have sex on the street, they go home, have sex, little Johnny wakes up, questions himself, fucking does it again. He goes to the strip club, fucks some more people, when he is drunk, questions himself some more, then tries phone sex, but his dick is too small.
My dad's the oldest, and when he was young, he shot my grandpa's balls off, but I thought about it. How does my dad have younger brothers?
Joke 1# "Knock, knock." Who's there? "Pastur." Pastur who? "Past ur bedtime."
Joke 2# Why does a slug always win a race? Because its components always stop for a break.
Joke 3# Your momma's so fat when she stepped on the scale it said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number."
I AM SFLUGO FOUNDER OF THE PRO ORPHAN JOKE CLUB. Just want to say that people spamming does nothing and we will keep making our jokes!! #SaveOrphanJokes and please say in the comments if you want to join the club.
Why does this website have a home page? It's an orphan joke waiting to happen.
Why can’t an orphan use an iPhone?
Because the home button does not work.
My Friend: Why does Santa look like that?
My 15 Year Old Friend: He has secateurs cancer...
Me: I heard it's because he comes once a year.
*Everyone Looks at me*
What does a lawyer defending a killer and a password have in common? They're case sensitive.
Little Johnny was walking down an alley and saw a lamp. After he rubbed it, a genie came out and said, "You have 10 seconds to have one wish." Little Johnny says he wants to pee alcohol. The genie grants his wish. He tells his family, and his sister doesn't believe it. After having a drink, she says, "We should have this every night!" Little Johnny gets two cups every night, one for him and his sister. He does the same thing for four nights. Eventually, he ran out of cups and has one left. He gives it to himself, and his sister asks, "Where's my cup?" Little Johnny replied, "You're drinking out of the bottle tonight."
Why does an orphan always get the newest iPhone?
Because so he does not have a home button.
What do you call a boomerang that does not come back?
An orphan's parents.
Why does an orphan have an iPhone X?
Because they have no home button.
I tried to pull (his/her) leg at the comedy club, but got arrested for sexual harassment. Does that still count as a joke? 🤣
What does a pickle look like a p*nis?
How many orphans does it take to screw a light bulb in there house?
None because they don't have a home.
What’s got 4 wheels, does a barrel roll, and goes from green to red in seconds?
Kermit in a car crash.