Difference jokes

What's the difference between me and a bus?

I'm not on fire...

What's the difference between a gun and a penis?

The American government does not define you as having the constitutional right to a penis.

What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?

Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda...

What is the difference between Black people and coal?

It’s bad for the environment to burn coal.

What is the difference between a broom and a mop?

It’s hard to beat my girlfriend when she’s holding the mop.

What is the difference between white people and coal?

It’s bad for the environment to burn coal.

What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and a book?

A book has papers.

What's the difference between COVID and 9/11?

I've never heard of someone dying in a car accident, and the media blaming it on 9/11.

What’s the difference between Kendrick Lamar and an orphan?

He has family ties.

What's the difference between a priest and a rabbi? A rabbi cuts it off, a priest sucks it off.

What is the difference between me and Paul Walker?

I’ve watched Fast and Furious Seven.

What’s the difference between Geico and a wife?

Geico saves you more.

What’s the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?

Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.

What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?

They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.

What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...

It don't moan when u put milk inside.

What's the difference between a priest and Woody from Toy Story?

Woody goes limp when a kid walks in the room.

What's the difference between Derek Boogaard and Kurt Cobain? Nothing, they were both fucked in the brain when they died.

What is the difference between a normal joke and a dad joke?

When it leaves and never comes back.

What’s the difference between a doctor and a pedophile?

The doctor doesn’t enjoy giving physicals.

What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer?

I don't know, I have both!