Difference jokes
What's the difference between a priest and Woody from Toy Story?
Woody goes limp when a kid walks in the room.
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One makes you believe in Heaven, the other makes you feel it.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...
It don't moan when u put milk inside.
What’s the difference between Geico and a wife?
Geico saves you more.
What is the difference between a normal joke and a dad joke?
When it leaves and never comes back.
What’s the difference between a doctor and a pedophile?
The doctor doesn’t enjoy giving physicals.
What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer?
I don't know, I have both!
What's the difference between a shopping bag and Michael Jackson?
One is white, made of plastic, and dangerous for children. The other is for groceries.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One kneels to pray, one kneels to pay.
What’s the difference between an epileptic corn shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?
The epileptic corn shucker “shucks between fits”...
What's the difference between Mark Zuckerberg and a lizard?
There is no difference.
What's the difference between the Queen's death and Princess Diana's death? The Queen died in peace, not pieces.
What is the difference between cum and milk? Nothing. They are both white and tasty.
What's the difference between Spongebob and a feminist?
A feminist has hair.
What's the difference between a hooker and a mosquito?
The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
What’s the difference between a tire and three-hundred-sixty-five used condoms?
One’s a good year; the other’s a great year!
what's the difference between an onion and a baby?
nobody cries when you cut up the baby.
What's the difference between Tyler and a rooster? A rooster says, "cock-a-doodle-doo," Tyler says, "any cock will do."
What's the difference between a sidewalk, a drug dealer, and a prostitute?
A: A sidewalk's crack doesn't leave an odor!