Difference jokes
What is the difference between a broom and a mop?
It’s hard to beat my girlfriend when she’s holding the mop.
What is the difference between white people and coal?
It’s bad for the environment to burn coal.
What's the difference between COVID and 9/11?
I've never heard of someone dying in a car accident, and the media blaming it on 9/11.
What’s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can’t hear an enzyme.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...
It don't moan when u put milk inside.
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One makes you believe in Heaven, the other makes you feel it.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
What’s the difference between Geico and a wife?
Geico saves you more.
What is the difference between a normal joke and a dad joke?
When it leaves and never comes back.
What’s the difference between a doctor and a pedophile?
The doctor doesn’t enjoy giving physicals.
What’s the difference between a tire and three-hundred-sixty-five used condoms?
One’s a good year; the other’s a great year!
What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer?
I don't know, I have both!
What's the difference between a shopping bag and Michael Jackson?
One is white, made of plastic, and dangerous for children. The other is for groceries.
What's the difference between Mark Zuckerberg and a lizard?
There is no difference.
What's the difference between the Queen's death and Princess Diana's death? The Queen died in peace, not pieces.
What’s the difference between an epileptic corn shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?
The epileptic corn shucker “shucks between fits”...
What's the difference between Spongebob and a feminist?
A feminist has hair.
What's the difference between a hooker and a mosquito?
The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
what's the difference between an onion and a baby?
nobody cries when you cut up the baby.
What's the difference between Tyler and a rooster? A rooster says, "cock-a-doodle-doo," Tyler says, "any cock will do."