If someone told me to bring up 9/11. They were trying to make a funny joke but it didnt work. That one really *crashed and burned*
I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!
I was driving with my parent and shouted, "It's a superhero!" But I didn't know it was an emo kid.
Why didn't the dog want to play football??
'Cause he was a boxer!
My girlfriend didnt bring me the sandwich so i brought the gas
why did the blind woman get raped?
because she didnt know she was wearing see through clothes
Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"
Why didnt Donald trump build the wall? Because Mexicans did not and would not build the damn wall!
one day a couple was walking when the man stepped on something hard and squishy then they heard a sound from the bushes, instead of looking down they both ran.
two years later they turned on the TV to find Ted Bundy on trial they asked him if he has ever been caught he said "No but a couple was walking as soon as i killed a girl i jumped into a bush they didnt know i was there but the man stepped on the dead body but didn't look down then he and his girlfriend ran."
Your mama is so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the concrete cracked up.
Yo mama so fat when she fell I didnt laugh but the concrete laughed up.
Why didn't the orphan do the work?
Because when the teacher says they would call your mum or dad, there's nobody to call.
in my locality there was an orphanage but everybody in the locality was really sexist too so they had to change the orphanage into a brothel cuz everybody took the boys away and nobody was taking the girls and the manager didnt want to waste any 14 year old pussy . did he?
titanic didnt sink by a iceberg. titanic sank by 1000000000000000000000000 titanics
Why didn't the pirate want to play cards?
Because he was standing on the deck!
Why didn't the teddy bear want to go to the gym?
Because he didn't want to get ripped.
Old Mother Riley, had a fat cow.
She milked it and milked it but didn't know how, she pulled his tail, pulled his tits. Old Mother Riley was covered in sh!t.
Q?: Why didn't the Oak tree win the election? A: He didnt get the votes he was oaking for, Because he was not the popular vote.
Why didn't Logan Paul high five the Asian man? Because he loves to leave Asians hanging.
I asked my orphan friend to come to my house, he said he was confused because he didnt know what that is
