The orphan turned 18, but he was happy because he didn't have to pay rent to his parents.
What did the blind kid get for his birthday?
I don't know, he still didn't look.
Someone: When you suffer from depression and someone tells you to cheer up.
Me: My, what a great idea! Why didn't I think of that? ;)
You know what I said to the chair? "Sit!" But it didn't move. Hahaha!
My friend asked, "What's that on your arm?" I replied, "Oh, this? I didn't have enough storage on my phone to download Fruit Ninja so I had to improvise a little bit."
Why would Tommy kill Philza's wife just to make Phil believe she didn't exist?
LIKE AND SUB IF YOU LI/j
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents? They cry... They scream.. with joy "Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents" Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didnt live to tell the tail...
Why is the Pentagon mad?
Because it didn't get two pizzas, but only one plane pizza.
A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.
When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"
God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."
Yo mama is so short, Minions look down at her.
Yo mama is so fat that she volunteered for the Hunger Games 'cause she thought it was an eating competition.
Yo mama is so ugly when Santa Claus saw her, he yelled "Ho Ho Holy Sh*t!"
Yo mama is so old, when she walked into an antique store, they didn't let her leave.
Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.
When we told twin towers to put on airplane mode we didnt mean a real airplane
When you suffer from depression and someone tells you to just cheer up, god damn, why didn't I think of that?
Why can you dsy Kobe even though you missed? Because he didnt land either
why do orphans eat their breakfast with water because their dad didnt come back with the milk
My mother caught me jerking off and she told me to leave it out. I didn't know what she was doing but she grabbed my cock and started sucking. Then I found out on porn she was doing deep throat.
A couple of weeks later my dad caught me jerking off, I thought he would deep throat, but he just walked up to me and slapped my boner. I cried for 5 hours. Luckily my mum gave me a sloppy joe afterwards.
I was at school one day and my teacher gave me home work and once i got home i did not do my home work but i watched TV after movie i finally went to go do my home work i was almost done with my home work when i got to the last question i didnt know the answer so i asked the closest living being to me witch was my dog and i asked him: whats two minus two? he said nothing
Helen threw up gang signs her whole life and didn't know.
One day an orphan threw a boomerang. It's not the only thing that didn't come back.
I didn't get the joke at first, then it hit me like a plane.
Why do orphans go to the market?
To get the milk their parents didn't bring back.
