Depression jokes
How do you get an emo out of the tree?
You cut the rope.
What kind of bath bomb does an emo person use?
A toaster.
Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.
Too bad only one was standing. :)
What's an emo's favorite game?
Limbo.
(If you don't understand the joke, go look up what Limbo is.)
What makes emos jump?
Bridges.
Q: Why do depressed people always have colored hair?
A: That’s as close as they can get to dye.
What do lesbians and turtles have in common? They both choke on plastic.
Me: Wanna hear a joke?
Person: Sure.
Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.
Person: Dear God...
What makes sad people jump? A bridge.
1273. My mother does not love me, nor does anyone, and my family doesn't either.
I have cripple and depression.
When I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, they got all excited and asked if I could fly a plane.
What's the difference between me and my pencil sharpeners? Nothing, we're both broken.
My ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's going to be hanging tonight.
Once in 4th grade, right now, I told a random tree, "Hey, my day is bad right now, can we hang later?"
The tree said: "Yeah, we are going to be hanging every day :) !!! If you can last :)"
A kid went and got a haircut. The day after, he went to school, and a friend says, "I like your cut." He replies, "Which one?"
What do you call a failure in another language?
Me.
I wish my lawn was emo so it would cut itself.
What did the depressed kid do in P.E.? They played with the jump rope, but they used it the wrong way.
I can go to Walmart and scan my wrists. It'll say "antidepressants." ✨