Death jokes
What did the farmer say to the doll?
You death baby doll.
Why did the orphan die?
He killed himself because the lack of a support system made him depressed.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts.
Why are orphans so bad at learning about ancient Egypt? They don't know what mummies are.
How's your dad?
What? I forgot he's still sleeping.
You know what should give up and stay dead?
Fortnite.
Soldiers, there is one thing you can be sure of: You will be at home with your families, in a jar on the mantelpiece.
Why do orphans die so much?
'Cause MJ said "she got COVID-19."
What falls quicker off a tree? The leaf or the emo?
The leaf, because the emo is stopped by the rope.
Juice WRLD died a legend. Making these jokes won't get you anywhere. Grow up.
An electrician walks into a green house. He sees a red room. He wonders why it's red because Kurt Cobain and his shotgun were sitting there.
Please read all of it. I know it's long, please read all of it.
This dad heard his daughter praying. As she was praying, she came to an end: "Goodnight grandma, goodbye grandpa, goodnight daddy, goodnight mommy." The dad didn't think about the grandpa part and headed to bed. The next morning, the mom and dad heard that the grandpa died. The dad thought it was just coincidence, so he carried on with his day. At night, he heard his daughter again: "Goodbye grandma, goodnight daddy, goodnight mommy." After he heard "goodbye grandma," his facial expression changed, and he went straight to bed. The next morning, the grandma died out of nowhere. The dad began to worry and continued on with his day. At night, he heard his daughter again: "Goodbye daddy, goodnight mommy." The dad got scared, so he had a plan to go to work and stay hidden there. So that's what he did. When he got home the next day, his wife asked where he had been, and he replied back, "Sorry honey, I had a horrible day today." She replied back saying: "Oh, you think you had a bad day? The mailman just died on the front porch this morning!" If you get it, you get it.
Man: Die, potato!
Potato: *screams*
I like trains.
Kid: I like trains.
Man: No, wait!
Train: *kills man*
What happens if you inhale too much nitrous oxide (laughing gas)?
You die of laughter.
What’s the only positive thing about Freddie Mercury’s death?
The HIV test results.
My Italian chef friend died last week. He pasta away.
If just Africa had more mosquito nets, millions of innocent mosquitoes could be saved from a horrible death of AIDS.
R.I.P. on a tombstone normally means "Rest In Peace"; however, in Madeleine McCann's case, it means "Raped In Portugal".
The optimistic midget's coffin was half full.
What do you call the most famous skeleton detective?
Sherlock Bones!