Death jokes
My dad told me a story today. His mom, my grandma, said if a bird gets in your house, someone will die.
That day, a hummingbird got in his UPS truck, and that’s the day he found out that my grandma had cancer. 😭😭😭😭😭 6 weeks later, she died. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Note to all.
My name is Lariah. Lariah Carla Brown, 14 years old and I am 1 of triplets. I don't understand how rape jokes are funny, and I just want to make that statement clear. I also hate orphan jokes because I WAS one. Notice when I put WAS! I also see jokes about cancer, now I know you can't be kidding. You know that cancer is a disease that many people get and could die from, so you are just wrong about that!
Stephen Hawking didn’t die naturally, his carer just forgot to put him on charge.
Stephen Hawking only died because he tried to install Windows 10, and his hard drive corrupted.
What did the orphans do when the bombs drop?
They said, "Allahu Akbar."
Where was Stephen Hawking buried?
In a black hole. 😂🤣
Yo mama so stupid, she thought Kobe Bryant survived the plane crash.
Jack and Jill went up my ass to eat a big dildo, but Jack died cause he got hit by a brown thing.
These jokes make me want to die.
If an emo and a leaf are in a tree, which one will fall first?
Answer: The leaf. The rope saved the emo.
How emos propose: Would you please join my family tree?
Ok, I found this off of an internet meme, this isn't original:
*grabbing kid* Harambe: Ok kid, I don't have much time, but Obama's last name is- *gunshot*
Little Timmy said, "I had a body, eieio, now you are next!" as he shoots you.
If cancer was a person I’d shake their hand and say: "Thank you for your service."
Sorry if it’s too far, but don’t come here if you can’t take it.
After I am dead during my funeral service, I want someone to play my favorite song by Boy George and Culture Club, "Church of the Poison Mind."
I’ll never forget my grandpa's last words to me...
“Are you still holding the ladder??”
Q: How do you make a fire?
A: Oil and dead babies.
Me: Hey, wanna know my spirit animal?
Friend: Sure.
Me: Roadkill, because I can see my mom pretty clearly now.
Friend: Wait, aren't you dead?
Me: Aren't you my son?
Friend: So that's what Mom was trying to hide from me.
The granddaughter wanted to see granny. She killed herself.
Did Jesus die virgin? Nope, he got nailed before he died.