Death jokes
What’s a necrophiliac’s safe word? I’m alive.
So apparently, Kurt Cobain's death was mind-blowing.
Who are the fastest readers ever? 9/11 victims, they went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
In 9/11, people were dying for the pizza. But it was at the bottom, so they had to die for it literally.
Why did Sally not come home from school today?
Because she died by a flying brick!
My uncle died from falling off a ladder and landing on his head (true story).
All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put my uncle together again.
Nechen has been writing articles for the class for years.
Then the Guru asked him, "If I die now, what will be on my grave?" Fritchen searched for the plastic bag and shouted, "This is a protective bag!!"
You're so boring that you make war veterans die quicker, and yet they're still on life support.
Q. What's Terri Schiavo's favorite movie?
A. The Purge.
Someone prank calls a general. The general hangs up and goes, "Kids these days have no respect for their elders. That's why I send them all to die."
Kobe: "Don't crash!"
Helicopter: *Crashes*
If a woman named Susan gets murdered, is it considered a Sue-icide?
What did Kobe say to the helicopter?
"Don't crash!"
What happened to the chicken when he crossed the road? He didn't. He got run over by a truck.
I was going to charge my phone, so I pulled a plug and put it in. Then, my grandpa wasn't breathing anymore.
What can Miles Morales do that Spiderman can't?
Hug his parents.
Me die.
Guess whose parents didn't survive?
Liv's parents.
Why did Kenny die?
Was he trying to kill himself? Was he just dicking around?
October 1, 2017 is when the Mandalay Bay became the Mandalay spray. Thank Steve for that.