Death jokes
How many dead children does it take to change the light in a basement?
More than ten, apparently.
Person 1: Why did you put the baby feet first into the blender? Person 2: To see his facial expression. Why else?
How do you bury a prostitute?
In a Y-shaped coffin.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His power went out.
saddest youtube comment :(
What's the hardest line to draw in a hospital?
... A FLATLINE!
On the plus side, Nicola Bulley no longer has a problem with alcohol.
Today I gave a blind guy a gun and told him it was a hair dryer. Since I have no fingerprints, the police said it was suicide. I guess you can say I took care of him!
What's green and smells like ham?
Kermit the frog's fingers.
A bully told an orphan to cry to his parents, so he did.
His adoptive parents were very supportive about the situation, and everything was settled. He died in an accident a day later.
Why can't an orphan live peacefully?
Technoblade: As a ghost, he could locate all orphans within 2 weeks.
What's the best thing about a prostitute dying on you during sex?
The second hour is free.
When your baby is stillborn and you have a funeral, what song should you never play?
Alphaville - "Forever Young."
The only reason Stephen Hawking died was because he saw the end.
Cremation, the last chance to have a smoking hot body.
Suicide isn't funny, but you can spice it up by wearing a fun hat.
If you die a virgin, then where does your v-card go? Does it go with you to the grave, or does your mortician take it from you?
What's the difference between a Porsche and 50 dead babies?
..... I don't have a Porsche in my garage.
I killed a homeless dude, now she's at the funeral home. 😭💔
What's worse than finding one dead baby in a bin? Finding one dead baby in five bins.