Death jokes
What is the best cure for aging?
Suicide.
What did the baby cow say to the mommy cow when he saw a hamburger?
"Mommy, is that Uncle Joe?"
Went to my friend's house, fucked his sister.
I had a fun funeral / birthday.
Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?
It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.
I can barely remember the last words my uncle told me.
"Let go of my nose!"
Where do feminists go when they die? "Hell's Kitchen."
Maybe we should stop talking about orphans, their parents will get ma... oh wait.
I wish I was a dinosaur because all of them are dead.
If I wanted to commit suicide, I would climb up to your ego, and then jump down to your IQ.
I'll never forget my grandpa's last words:
"You need to park a little closer."
Halloween! The day nobody questions the bodies dangling in your tree!
Why are orphans good at math? Because they can subtract their parents from the family.
Why couldn't the T-rex clap his hands?
Because he's dead.
I'll remember my last words... "Sorry, I'm not sorry!"
What is the difference between a leaf falling from a tree and an emo falling from a tree?
The leaf falls to the ground, the emo just hangs there.
What’s the best part about fucking a dead bitch?
You don’t need consent.
How did Steven Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
Girl: I've been an orphan since I was three.
Boy: Knock knock.
Girl: ...Who's there?
Boy: Not your parents!
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To find their parents.
I like George Floyd's new song. It is really breathtaking.