Death jokes
Why did the Emo Chicken cross the road?
To get hit by a car.
How do stars die?
Normally, an overdose.
If an emo kid and the quiet kid had a fight, the quiet kid would win because the emo kid would cut himself to death.
Genie: You cannot wish for more wishes, immortality, or love.
Man: I wish not to die a virgin.
Genie: I just said no wishing for immortality!
Hey, people don't fly with suicide jokes.
In fact, they hang with them!
A man comes home, and the wife says, "My ex just died by getting hit by a bus." And the husband said, "I lost my job as a bus driver."
What did I say to the bridge?
Bye, bridge.
What's the difference between an emo and a banana?
They both hang like apples.
Did you hear about the woman who put her husband’s ashes in a burrito?
He gets to tear that ass up one more time.
What’s the best thing about making out with dead girls?
They can’t say no.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”
How do you know when a fat person stops eating? You read about it in the obituary.
What were Paul Walker's last words?
I dk probably "WATCH THE FUCKING TREE!"
Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff?
Neither did I until I found his Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment.
Why did the orphan jump off of bridge?
So they can reunite with their dead family.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Suicide.
Suicide who?
Suicide you.
If you overdose on Viagra, do you die... hard?
Why would a dead guy lie?
Because he can't stand up.
Chuck Norris is so immortal, even he killed Death.
Why is the graveyard so noisy?
Because of all the coffin : )