Dead jokes
Bruh, the cops just arrested a black dude...
Well nvm, they shot him dead.
Killing someone is better than killing yourself.
I am a God. Na, na, na, na, na, na. Yeah.
She's got makeup by the mirror in her bedroom, Thigh-high fishnets and some black boots, Nose pierced with the cigarette perfume, Half dead, but she still looks so cute. She is a monster in disguise, And she knows all the words to the trap songs, Takes pic's with a cherry-red lipstick, Says she only dates guys with a big..., mmm
Gwen, are you dead????? If not, I am Alya. Thanks for always standing up for me!!!!!!!!!!!
When you’re having the best sex in your life and your grandma says, “I’m not dead!”
"My parents are dead, lol," said the orphan.
One night, a father heard his daughter saying good night.
"Good night, Mom."
"Good night, Dad."
"Good night, Mamah."
"Good bye, Papa."
The next day her papa died.
He heard her saying them a month later.
"Good night, Mom."
"Good night, Dad."
"Good bye, Mamah."
The next day her mamah died.
Well, her dad was scared for his life. He knew he was next. Well, his daughter said them again.
"Good night, Mom."
"Good bye, Dad."
The next day, the mail man dropped dead on their porch.
What do you call a dead hooker?
It doesn't matter, she won't answer you.
What is the last thing that goes through a suicide bomber's mind?
His arse.
My gardener found a dead body. Of the old gardener!
Yo mama's so stinky that whenever she walks into a building, the flies drop dead!
Noose: "Hey man, wanna hang out?"
Corpse: "Sorry man, I'm dead inside."
I was at a funeral and told a joke, and my sister said, "I'm dead." So I said, "That's what she said."
Why can't ghosts stay happy? Because they are too skeletal.
Uranus caught a 3-meter flatty while surfing. Check the tail still kicking. Deadly, my bruz!
Friend 1: Did you?
Depressed friend 2: I didn't!
Friend one: Swear on your life!
Depressed friend 2: I swear.
A week later friend 2 dropped dead to their utter delight.
Abortion is a really touchy subject for me. On one hand, there's dead babies! But on the other hand, women get a choice.
What do you do with a dead chemist?
You Ni-tro-gen!
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
'Cause they are dead.
How do skeletons make love?
They bone each other!