Day Jokes

What is a chicken's favorite day of the week? Fri day.

I don't understand why in horror movies they make digging a grave look so easy, It usually takes me days

On the fourth month (Symbolizing 41%) on the first day, transgenders mourn for the trans suicides

That day is called "April Fool's"

One day, he started crying out of nowhere. Everyone started crying with him. There was a crying pandemic going around.

Sonic says... April 1st is the best day do a school shooting they will think it’s a joke 😃

Walked into a bar the other day and a group of sailors were being load and shouting about all the woman they have in port that had given them gonorrhea.... Bloody Seamen.

So my friends birthday is in a couple of day's, and I was wondering what to get him. He hangs out at my house a lot, so I suggested adoption papers'

Remember back in the day when your TV wouldn't work so you'd bang it a few times?

I tried that with my dishwasher, but unfortunately, she ended up pregnant...

Why are carpenters never horny after work? Because they’ve already spent all day getting hammered and nailing things

bro this guys hairline I saw the other day was no were to be seen

When I have a staring contest, I always win. Everyday, I see blind people who hate me.

Why did the snowman say Good day to the sun? Because it was afraid to melt away by the sun

I say a little girl crying and I said where is your parents that day I got fired from the orphanage 🤪

Little boy: Momma Mom: Yes my dear Little boy: One day I wanna work in McDonald's Mom: Why!? Little boy: Just to see if there ice cream machine is actually broken

Quote of the day-

A bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can't go anywhere until you change it.

Chao!!!

If you have a bad day go tell an orphan to find his parents. he will be searching all day

What a day yesterday was I got a promotion and my sisters killer was hit by a bus now I’m in a cast!

Guy: Hi, how was your day today. Woman: Good! Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant* Guy: How many months pregnant are you? Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also I’m not pregnant.