Day jokes
If you have a bad day, just think there are at least 15 people who care about you.
Would you rather have a menstrual period with horrible cramps for 200 days straight (including men)?
Or eat 10 lbs of dog s**t every day for 100 days?
Hey, yesterday I played with my sister. When I woke up, she was gone.
What day is Labor Day?
It's the day mommies have their babies.
A friend of mine told me something that I cannot forget, and I am now traumatized to hell. The next day a kid was set for an amber alert that looked exactly like my DEAR friend! :)
Once in 4th grade, right now, I told a random tree, "Hey, my day is bad right now, can we hang later?"
The tree said: "Yeah, we are going to be hanging every day :) !!! If you can last :)"
One day a son and his grandad were smoking.
Too bad only the sun was smoking. :)
Roses are red, violets are blue, in the middle of the day, give me money, you!
Your dad left you 10 years ago and you're 10 years old, so your dad anniversary is today.
Why am I in jail? Because I wasn't invited to the party in the orphanage 23 days ago. Stupid fucks.
A kid calls out for his mom one day while he is in the tub and says, "Mom come quick! I'm walking on water!"
And the mom runs in and says, "I knew evon whatent yo daddy! I ain't never slept with him a day my life!"
The doctor gave his patient 1 day of life, so he shot him. Then the judge gave him 15 years, so there you go, problem solved.
When did Jesus die?
On Luan Day hahahahahahahahahahahahaha LOUD HOUSE wink wink.
Okay, okay, so one day I was on the way home, and this kid said, "Man, I could kick your butt." Five seconds later, I kicked his butt.
To anyone who wants to be my friend:
Hello.
Does anyone wanna be my friend? Please if ya' do reply to my: "Hello." In the chat. Tysm. Have a greaat day!
Alex <3
I found a place before called an orphanage, but when I was allowed in there were lots of kids, and I said, "Where's your parents? Oh yeah, you're orphans." Gosh, that was one heck of a day!
One day, the milkman came to drop off milk.
The boy asked the milkman, "Do you know where my dad is?"
The milkman replies, "I am your dad," then runs off like Batman!
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year? Because there is no Mother's or Father's Day.
How was your day, Freshfry?
My dad went out with Nemo one day to the store. They still haven't come back.