Darkness jokes
Where did little billy go when he was stuck in a minefield... everywhere.
That joke was pretty dark, but it got pretty light for a second.
If you think vanilla and chocolate ice cream is just light and dark mode.
Q: What do you call a blonde with only two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
You know stairs, right? The dark... My there is something. I know that if you fall down the stairs, your balls will be crushed!
Why didn’t the Twin Towers like their pizza?
Cause it was plain.
Memes
Q. What is Terri Schiavo's favorite Eminem song?
A. "Till I Collapse."
Is it just me, or everybody has a dark side, like a psycho side, and then you act like crazy for some reason?
Humor is like skin; the darker it gets, the less people like it.
How many CIA agents does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
They don't need lightbulbs--they glow in the dark.
How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just like hanging in the dark.
A man was about to go into the bar with his dog when he realized the sign said, “No pets allowed!” He was about to walk away when another guy walked up with his dog. The 2nd man put on dark shades and said, “Just pretend you're blind!” He walked in with his dog, got a drink, then left.
The 1st man did the same thing, but when he walked in, the bartender said, “You know your ‘guide dog’ is a chihuahua, right?”
The man said, “They gave me a damn Chihuahua?!”
What time is it when it gets dark out?
Bed time.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
You know, having an uncle is a good thing sometimes! I get a pair of shoes every week. He says it’s my reward for playing the tickle game with him in his damp and dark basement. It hurts sometimes. But hey, new shoes!
Dark jokes are just like food.
Not everyone gets it.
What do you call a black man in the dark?
- Nothing.
What did one candle say to the other?
"Want to go out tonight?"
So last week I gave my blind friend a cheese grater. The next two weeks he told me that was the most violent book he has ever read.
There is a dark alley. Who do you call?
Batman.
If a blind person can’t see, then do they sleep?
They’re the night watchers while people who see sleep.