One day my kid with no arms came up to me and said, "Mom, what's dark humor?" I thought about it, then said, "Go wave to that blind person." He just looked at me, confused, but angry.
I looked so deep in the dark web, I started to see Tyrone.
How many CIA agents does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
They don't need lightbulbs--they glow in the dark.
A dark sense of humor is like a pair of functioning legs. Not everybody has one.
How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just like hanging in the dark.
A man was about to go into the bar with his dog when he realized the sign said, “No pets allowed!” He was about to walk away when another guy walked up with his dog. The 2nd man put on dark shades and said, “Just pretend you're blind!” He walked in with his dog, got a drink, then left.
The 1st man did the same thing, but when he walked in, the bartender said, “You know your ‘guide dog’ is a chihuahua, right?”
The man said, “They gave me a damn Chihuahua?!”
What time is it when it gets dark out? Bed 🛌 time
A couple has sex in the dark every single night.
One night, the wife gets curious about what goes on, so they start f...ing, and she flicks the light on. When she flicks the light on, she catches him with a dildo playing with her pussy. She's so mad that she started ranting and raving. The husband says, "Honey, I know you're mad, and I'll explain the toy. Just do me one favor: explain the children."
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Dark jokes are just like food.Not every one gets it
So last week I gave my Blind friend a cheese grater. The next 2 weeks he told me that was the most violet book he has ever read
There is a dark alley Who Do You Call? Batman.
What did one candle say to the other?
"Want to go out tonight?"
My jokes are so dark that I am surprised that the cops didn't shoot them yet.
You know, having an uncle is a good thing sometimes! I get a pair of shoes every week. He says it’s my reward for playing the tickle game with him in his damp and dark basement. It hurts sometimes. But hey, new shoes!
What do you call a black man in the dark?
- Nothing.
If a blind person can’t see, then do they sleep?
They’re the night watchers while people who see sleep.
Rules of dark humor.
1. Everything shall be touched.
2. If it offends someone, it shall not be touched.
Mom: See that guy over there with no hands, tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I'm blind.
Mom: Exactly!
Why did the dog walk out at night?
To scare his people!
