Cry jokes
How do you make a builder cry?
Kill his family.
I went to a girl and I said, "DEEZ NUTS!"
What’s red and cries?
A skinned baby in a bag of salt.
Why did the orphan cry when the teacher yelled at him?
Because the teacher said, "Don't make me call your parents!"
"I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying."
- Charlie Chaplin
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.
A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and asked him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I’m the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.” “I still don’t get it,” responded Little Johnny. “Why don’t you sleep on it then? Maybe you’ll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then...good night,” said Little Johnny and went off to bed.
In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother’s crying. He went to his baby brother’s crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent’s room to get help. When he got to his parent’s bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn’t there. So he went to the maid’s room. When he looked through the maid’s room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, “OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!”
Confusion life question!!!
* Can you cry underwater? * Do fishes ever get thirsty? * Why don't birds fall out the tree when they sleep? * Why is a building called that when it's already built? * When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?
Why do babies cry? Cuz they can't suck very well.
Why are washers better than babies?
Washers don't cry when you put a load in them.
I asked my orphan friend what his movie is, he said "Spiderman: No Way Home." I said, "Probably because it's so relatable, right?" He started crying. I don't know why.
My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...
So I threw a coconut at her.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just sit in the dark and cry.
Enough of the jokes. It's time Togo back home. (hah, I wanna cry.)
What do you do when a baby starts to cry?
You use more lube.
If you slit your wrist while crying in pain, that's self-harm.
If you slit your wrist but have no expression, that's acting.
It isn't any of those if it's suicide.
Yo mama so ugly she made happy meals cry.
Bible Verse of The Day - For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children.
—Romans 8:15-16
Why do orphans cry so much?
They can’t find a place to go.
What is the difference between an old chest and a kid? One doesn't cry when you drop it in the basement.