Crime jokes
What do you call a movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bill Cosby?
Predator.
POV: An Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid, and the kidnapper called the kid's mom. Then the mom said, "No, it's fine, my kid got a B, he failed." And the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failure.
I take back my comments on the United healthcare CEO.
Being poisoned by a nurse wouldn't be that bad of a way to die as long as the nurse diluted the potassium chloride first.
If being sexy was a crime, you can call me......... a law-abiding citizen.
Why did the terrorist not get paid, but they loved their job?
They di2s drying plans.
What's the difference between George Floyd and Joe Biden?
They both talk like they're on fent.
How do rappers stay organized?
They keep their rap sheets in order.
What do you call Helen Keller after she killed 10 people?
Helen Killer.
Man in boxers leads policeman on brief chase.
Your website.
When you're playing online with your friend, then you hear a kid scream: "No, Dad, please stop!" Scream ends with a gunshot.
How are babies and the elderly similar?
They are both fun to throw out of moving cars.
What did the man say when his girlfriend threw sodium and chloride at him?
That’s assault!
Jefferey Dahmer asked his husband a question.
His husband said, "What's your question?"
Jefferey Dahmer said, "You want to know what is my favorite type of tree?"
His husband said "Yes?"
Jefferey said, "Morning Wood, now take off your pants!"
What did the man do when he caught his wife cheating on him?
He honor-killed her.
Ms. Katie: I heard about a Vegan baby.
Mom: Here’s your Happy Meal.
Ms. Katie: That’s not vegan, did you trick me?
Kids: Yeah!
Ms. Katie: That’s it, little baby Jimmy, I’m giving you shaking baby syndrome!
Mom: Please don’t hurt my son.
*Ms. Katie shakes Jimmy*
Mom: I’m secretly a cop, and you are arrested.
What do you call a pedophile who's dying? You.
1) What was Techno's reaction when he died?
2) Where did all the orphans go?
PS: In case you don't get it, it's a pedophile joke, cuz he is one!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Rape
Rape who?
I go rape you!
Hahaahahahaha Please comment: Bad or good!
Greg fucking steals toes!