Crime jokes
If you read this, you fucked your dad and your 4-year-old sister, you sick fuck... At least wait till they are 15.
Why did the guitar teacher get arrested?
He fingered A minor (get it, like the chord A minor)?
I had the worst day of my life. My 13 year old ex got killed and I got fired from my job as a police guard. Did I mention that we were in Syria?
I found a child on the street homeless, and they were really nice, so I took them home. Then I said, "Who's better, Biden or Trump?" They said they support Trump. They are now dead in my basement and have been for 3 years.
A pirate walks into a tavern with a pirate ship attached to his nutty wuttys. It's driving me nuts!
A troll proceeds to pull out a desert eagle and shoot the pirate in the face. He makes a poggers face and says, "Problem??"
POV: An Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid, and the kidnapper called the kid's mom. Then the mom said, "No, it's fine, my kid got a B, he failed." And the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failure.
How do rappers stay organized?
They keep their rap sheets in order.
What's the difference between George Floyd and Joe Biden?
They both talk like they're on fent.
Your website.
Man in boxers leads policeman on brief chase.
When you're playing online with your friend, then you hear a kid scream: "No, Dad, please stop!" Scream ends with a gunshot.
I went to school and everyone was screaming and looking at me. They weren't after I shot them, though.
What's the difference between Batman and Robin?
Batman can go to the store without robbin'.
How did they know Princess Diana had dandruff?
They found her Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment.
How are babies and the elderly similar?
They are both fun to throw out of moving cars.
What did the man say when his girlfriend threw sodium and chloride at him?
That’s assault!
What's the difference between PMS and a terrorist?
You can negotiate with the terrorist.
What do you call a movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bill Cosby?
Predator.
How do you get away with murder?
Why did the terrorist not get paid, but they loved their job?
They di2s drying plans.