Crime jokes
Did you know that statistically, 1 in 10 people live next to a pedophile? Not me though, I live next to a 10 year old boy with a fat ass.
Why did the orphan commit mass murder?
To be on top of the wanted list.
Do you know the murderer, The murderer, the murderer, Do you know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane?
Yes, I know the murderer, The murderer, the murderer, Yes, I know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane.
What’s a peedophile’s favorite shoes? White vans.
Why do pedophiles always lose a race?
Because they come in a little behind.
Why did the rape victim think it was Christmas?
Because her clothes were torn off like wrapping paper.
Why do boys feel safer at Ronald McDonald's House than Neverland Ranch?
Ronald McDonald's doesn't put his meat between boys' buns.
There were two peanuts walking down an alley. One was assaulted.
I was eating my cereal while watching the news, then I saw my cereal on the news, saying he was a "serial" killer.
ICE and ISIS have similar first syllables. Coincidence? I think not!
I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium, you're "being a respectful friend." Do it at home and you're "destroying evidence."
The rapist is a therapist.
Lol.
What do you call a man with no legs?
Hangman.
Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?
A: When they are falling from their balcony.
Who was the meanest man in the world?
He raped Helen Keller and threw her down a well, but not before cutting off her fingers so she couldn't yell for help.
I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.
The last entry was about 12 years old.
I killed 5 orphans and tried to sell their organs.
Nobody still wanted them.
Jack and Jill went up the hill, both had Bacardi rum. When Jill's was gone, she wanted Jack's, that's why she took it from him.
What do James Doyle and Hannah Doyle have in common?
John fucked them both in the rear.
When a person went to a restaurant, they died once they were in. Three people were a suspect. Two were suspected because she served the food. Turns out, it was the food!