Crash jokes
What's the difference between 911 and the stock market in the 1930's?
Nothing, they both crashed.
If you give Kobe Bryant a cigarette, he will be warm for a short time.
But he was set on fire in the helicopter crash, so now he's warm for the rest of his life.
If a chicken flies into the plane and the plane crashes, whose fault is it?
A: The driver's. Chickens can't fly.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
In other news, we are hearing of a nasty helicopter crash on the M4. Let's cross live to our eye-in-the-sky, Mark. Mark?
What do you call plane crash victims?
Down to earth people.
What did the Twin Towers say when they saw the airplane?
Batter up!
Why did Al Qaeda lose $100 on a bet?
They bet $100 that they wouldn't crash when they went through the Twin Towers.
Stephen Hawking is just in a role play. He died to a crash in Minecraft.
Looks like McSkillet McKilledIt.
Why did the plane crash in the ocean? Because the pilot saw steward Undercut!
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
He got hit!
Once my twin brother died from a plane crash. His last words were, "If it's a bomb, I'll give it a 9/11."
I never make that type of joke. They always seem to crash and burn.
What's the difference between a plane and a woman?
At least the plane doesn't give you herpes when it crashes at your place.
So, a bus crashes, killing everyone on the bus, and God feels so bad that He gives each one a wish.
The first person comes up, and she wants to be beautiful, so God makes her beautiful, and she goes into Heaven. The next person comes up, and he says, "I want to be beautiful as well." As this goes on, the last man in the back begins laughing a little, everyone becoming beautiful, until God asked the last person what they want, and he said, "I want everyone in front of me to be ugly again!" So God had to call the based department and gave him everything that last guy wanted.
There are 4 people on a plane while it's crashing and there are only 3 parachutes. There's Opera, Obama, a little girl, and Trump. Opera grabs a parachute and says, "I'm famous, I get one!" And Trump grabs one and says, "Well, I'm president, of course I get one!" Obama looks at the little girl and says, "Since you're the future of our generation, take the last one." The little girl hugs Obama and says, "Actually, we can both have one. Trump took my backpack!"
My uncle died in 9/11. He was in the plane that crashed in the field.
The only thing brighter than my cuteness is the fire on the Twin Towers.
My grandpa died in 9/11. He was a great pilot.