Country jokes
Texas 😂😂😂😂
Yo forehead is so big it couldn't even fit in the United States.
A man driving along a country road sees a little girl crying next to a cliff. He gets out and says, "Aw, what's the matter little girl?"
She points off the cliff, and at the bottom is the family car, burning with everyone inside, all mangled and dead.
The man unbuckles his pants and says, "Little girl, today just ain't your day."
Q: What do you call America in a year? A: A wasteland.
America... Amefrica... Amfrica... Africa...
A young boy was talking to his friend about his family:
"My great-grandfather fought against Napoleon, my grandfather fought against the English, my father fought against the Americans, and my uncle against the Argentinians."
The friend replied: "It seems that your family can't get along with anybody!"
What do you call two Mexicans at a country restaurant? "Two beaners in a cracker house."
Donald: "If I lose this election, I will leave the country."
Joe: "Bi den"
After getting in the White House, D. Trump gets a letter...
...from the Iranian president. He opens it and to his surprise there is a paper with a weird looking code on it:
370HSSV 0773H
All confused, Trump contacts the FBI and forwards the letter to them in hope they can figure out the meaning, but they weren't able to. Trump gets angry and sends the letter to both the CIA and NSA, and they also fail to figure out the meaning of the letter.
One of the agents suggests Trump ask for MI6's help, so he does and few minutes after a British agent sends a fax to his secretary:
"Tell your president he was holding the letter upside down."
What is the strongest weapon in India?
The red button (this is a fact).
What song genre do the national anthems fit into?
Country.
What do you call it when a town on the south coast of England sprouts legs and starts walking around the country?
A walkie-Torquay.
Am tired of my country!!!! How can two policemen use one gun?
Why does Mexico not have an Olympic team?
Because all of them that can jump, swim, and run are already here.
Which country makes me crack the fuck up?
LAUGHghanistan.
Afghanistan.
We are going to a country called Bangkok. When we are there, we will Bangkok.
What's India's favorite font?
Comic Sanskrit.
What are intelligent people in the US called?
"Tourist."
Why do fat cows eat fat cows? Because I wrote this in America.