Country jokes
What do you call the most fucking racist and obnoxious country in the fucking entire fucking omniverse? NORTH AMERICA!
And if you disagree just 'cus you're American, I don't give a fuck, you low life cunts. Plus, if you don't think you're racist, um, hello people? Motherfucking George Floyd!
Why do Americans always win at the shooting Olympics?
Because they train at the best school.
Americans live in the U.S.A. The quiet kids live in the U.Z.I.
There are three states you don't mess with when trying to take over the United States:
Alaska because they have three times more guns than people because of the bears.
Texas because, well, it's Texas. Where else have all of the guns been going?
Lastly, Florida. Florida is the absolute definition of Trigger Happy Redneck.
As an American, I like cars. And like all car enthusiasts, even just a little scratch can ruin a brand new car.
So why is it that we go to different countries like India and see that almost every car is completely totaled? I guess we have different meanings of "it's just a scratch."
What is the country that is always in a rush? Russia.
You take a plane from Australia. Your mom is American, your dad is British, and your brother (and you) is Canadian (well, because they traveled along many places). You are eating dinner, but you realized you were going to Europe.
You went sleepy, and you forgot your pet named "Strallia." But she could not go anyways, so you had to leave her. When you went to Europe, you were in the "COUNTRY-SIDE."
I couldn't think of anything because you're in the "countryside."
What is the continent that ALWAYS sleeps and sleeps and sleeps and that is so tired that it won’t wake up? Eur-ope.
How did the United States become a country? It broke all of its states.
How do you get a country girl's attention? A tractor.
What is the poorest country in the world?
Poortugal...
You wanna talk Kenya ;)
Spell "I hod."
Why did Monaco cross the road? It smashed a 1-mile radius of the road + the chicken.
What did South Korea say to North Korea? Go read a book!
Old soviet joke.
"Who is your mother?" "Our great Soviet country." "Who is your father?" "Our dear comrade Stalin." "What's your greatest desire?" "Becoming an orphan."
East Richmond has a train station at East Richmond, but Richmond is better, why?
Where is Australia?
Where is Colorado?