Conflict jokes

I've been trying to use Google Maps in Ukraine, but I couldn't because I only saw Russia.

How did the British lose the War of 1812?

They were out-Britshed.

Little Johnny was getting beaten up by two kids, so I came and helped.

He won’t stand against the three of us!

A black n***a crashes a neighborhood barbecue, bragging about his 'hood credentials' while hogging all the ribs and collard greens. The host calls him out, 'Yo, pay up or get out. Ain't no freebies here.' He laughs it off, 'Man, I run this block!' But the host's burly brother, who's been grilling the whole time, snarls, 'Wrong, fool. Time to settle the score.' He pins him against the picnic table, wraps a chain leash around his neck from the dog run, edges him with a vibrating basting brush slathered in hot sauce, and then plows his ass deep and hard, grunting, 'Now you're the main course, spicier than the jerk chicken!'

What do you call a white kid who kills another?

Russia vs Ukraine hahaha.

How does an American know that his time has come?

He starts hearing Vietnamese.

So, if Russia was the motherland and Germany was the fatherland, what does that mean?

The Western Front is domestic violence.

Just told Putin to get some b*tches.

Waiting for 3801 missiles to strike my house.

My sister told me only onions make you cry, so I always hit her back when she hit me, but I hit her with a shoe only to catch her cry.

Why can't a homeless person be in "The Boys?"

Because he would have beef with Homelander.

America: "WE NEED MORE AMMO!"

Japan: "We are the ammo."

Why is the Azovstal Steel Plant important to the Russian?

Because it stores Zelensky's balls of steel!

We destroyed two boats, and they dropped the sun on us twice!

If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?

Jokes about ISIS are all about the execution.

What do Israel and Epstein have in common?

"Look at that, time to blow up some kids."

The eyelash and the lipstick got into a fight. Soon they will make up.

If anyone ever makes a time machine, please make a bunker for Hitler/the Nazis and send them to 2050. I want to see who would die first, future us or them.

We all know yo homie bout to hop in a fight when:

1. He staring mighty hard at y'all.

2. When your friend know you gon get your ass beat.

3. When your friend say he not gon jump in (you know he lying).

Jim: My grandpa fought in the army during World War Two. He was an officer.

Me: Cool, what rank of officer?

Jim: SS.

Me:...