Conflict jokes
What is war used for? (put in comments below)
What is a terrorist's first move in chess?
C4.
What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?
I don't know, I'm just the drone pilot.
Russian history in 5 words: "And then things got worse."
One weekend some distant family members that I hadn't met before came over. My cousins (who I also hadn't met before) were fighting, so I decided to separate them and place them in opposite corners of the room (thinking it would help).
My mom took me to an empty room with tears in her eyes and told me they both ended up dying.
Well, SO-RRY, but I didn't know they were conjoined twins.
I popped some fireworks and told my Vietnamese grandfather that World War 3 started.
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.
Why is the Azovstal Steel Plant important to the Russian?
Because it stores Zelensky's balls of steel!
Women be like men cause wars, [but] forget men fight those wars while they fake cry.
*World War 2 going on and then stops.*
Me: "I guess you would say it was a gory-ious battle."
I have gathered intelligence regarding the Russian Forces that have been stalled in Ukraine for days. Apparently, they are installing rear view mirrors on their combat vehicles and tanks in order to see the battle at the front lines.
If 2 vegetables have an argument, it's called beef.
We will win the war! 🇷🇺🇷🇺🇷🇺
What do U.S. airstrikes and dark humor have in common?
They're normally pointed towards Africa and the Middle East.
The Twin Towers were mad at each other, so they all just started launching planes at themselves.
"You da bomb!" "No, you da bomb!"
In the US, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
The emo kid ran away after his parents asked why they took the barcode sticker off the Oreos.
There is only one thing I have to give my enemies.
A bucket full of dead baby heads and semen so they can replenish their spawn.
A gay guy and a trucker get in a car crash.
The gay guy says, "Somebody call the police! This man just rammed into me!"
The trucker says, "What the fuck did you just say, fucker? Get over here, I'm gonna wreck your ass!"
The gay man then says, "It's okay, everybody, don't call the police! He wants to negotiate."