Conflict jokes
Violence is never the answer:
It's the solution.
If two vegans are arguing, is it still considered beef?
Why is Russia invading Ukraine?
«Мы хотим вернуть Советский Союз!»
Do you know what's the difference between a knife and a girl's argument?
A knife has a point.
I talked to a future suicide bomber. I told him, "ISIS ain't got sh** on me because I planted a bomb and lived."
"You da bomb!" "No, you da bomb!"
In the US, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
What do you call an Iraqi swimming in the water?
A bath bomb.
I believe a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided completely if cowboy architects had just made their towns big enough for everyone...
What makes a nuke and divorce the same?
It only takes one of each to end your life.
In America, you fight Ukraine.
In Soviet Russia, you fight Mykraine.
Whoever killed Adolf Hitler is MY hero!
What do you call an Irish man that breaks up fights?
Liam Malone.
What's the difference between a Syrian kindergarten and an ISIS hospital?
I wouldn't know, I'm just the drone operator.
Ukrainians leave without saying goodbye.
Russians say goodbye without leaving.
Women understand each other.
That’s why they argue.
Zelensky: I'm begging for Russian forces to withdraw from the whole of Ukraine.
Putin: Crimea river.
What did the Taliban say to the Afghan?
Nothing, they blew him up.
Why can't a homeless person be in "The Boys?"
Because he would have beef with Homelander.
Who are the best at bowling?
Terrorists, they always throw strikes.
America: "WE NEED MORE AMMO!"
Japan: "We are the ammo."