Competition jokes

I once fought with a man in a wheelchair.

He couldn't stand a chance.

Why is America better than Japan at rapping?

Because we're better at dropping bombs.

Why didn't the koala make the finals? It got diskoalafied.

I was going to watch the origami world championships before it folded.

But it was only on paper view.

I was playing a tennis match against a girl and said, "I will fuck you up." She said, "Try me." So that's exactly what I did, and I won by forfeit as she ended up running away crying.

What's better than winning gold at the Paralympics?

Not being retarded.

And so the Lord said unto John, "Come forth, and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

My friend entered a pun contest. He entered ten, figuring at least one of them would win, but no pun in ten did.

Astronauts just found water on Mars! Mars: 1. Africa: 0.

Why doesn't Mexico compete in the Olympics?

Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump, and swim are in the U.S.

Ball so hard! 😂🤣

What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.

Why do rapists and pedophiles never win a race?

Because they always like to come in a little behind.

Hey guys, wish me luck on my game Al-Nassr vs. Raed Al-Raed. I have 604 million followers on Instagram, but we are not gonna be able to beat that. Can we get to 69 followers, please and thankyou?

I was playing football with my friends, and I got tackled and got a penalty. Suddenly, the ground started shaking, and Penaldo emerged from the mud. He took the penalty, but since it wasn't Andorra, he missed. Shame on you, Penaldo!

Why did the lion lose the race? Because he was playing with a cheetah.

Why did the legless kid think he won a race?

Because everybody already left.

Dream: Speedruns Minecraft.

Technoblade: Speedruns Life.

What do you call someone with an extra chromosome winning in a pool?

Posiedown.

Did you hear the scores of the African basketball game?

It was Eight-Nothing.