Competition jokes

I was doing a race, and I started after everyone 'cause I fell, but when I got up I realized I couldn't even race, not because I was behind, but because I can't go straight if I'm gay...

My girlfriend was cheating in Uno.

She's not the only one who can play that game.

I got in a cage fight.

The hamster didn't know what hit him!

"Slow and steady wins the race."

And there's the referee taking down Ronaldo's number.

Not really the time or the place, but it's good to see that we've kept homophobia out of football.

Who did a barber win a race?

He knew a short cut.

Yo son so excellent, he gone to a Rubik’s cube competition who competed against his daddy.

Mr. Beast challenge in Memphis be like: last one to survive the shooting wins 1 million dollars.

What do you call a country who needs another race just to be the best country in sports?

America.

What was the score of the basketball game in Africa?

Eight-nothing.

Playing a game called 7-Up.

Student: Why can't I use a pencil to tap their fingers?

Teacher: It's cheating!

Student: No! It's the object of the game.

Why did the rapper bring a broom on stage?

To sweep the competition!

If laziness was an Olympic sport, I'd come in fourth so I wouldn't have to walk up to the podium.

Why are Americans so good at shooting?

We have the best schools for it.

My friend: Hey, I got 15 kills!

Me: I got 60 kills!

My friend: I didn't know you played Call of Duty!

Me: What's Call of Duty?

When I have a staring contest, I always win.

Every day, I see blind people who hate me.

Russia vs. Ukraine is the ultimate CS:GO match ever!

I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.

Two magicians were in a competition. The first one did magic, and the second started counting down, "3, 2," but before he said the last number, he 1.

Comment your favorite sport.