New Competition Jokes - Page 8

Russia vs. Ukraine is the ultimate CS:GO match ever!

Why can't Hitler join track?

Because he can't even finish a race.

When Cincinnati played Alabama in 2021, they wore black at their funeral! 🤣

Why did the African win the food eating contest?

Beginner's luck.

Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.

Why was Liverpool better than Man United? We won 5-0, and you have a sex offender on your team.

South's losing to Broncos. 😹

Astronauts just found water on Mars! Mars: 1. Africa: 0.

It's about bottling.

It's about crying.

I stay finished, I fake retire.

Put in the diving.

Put in the ghosting

And take my fake trophies.

Eibar and Bolivia in my veins.

My Barcelona banged by Bayern.

I bottle the game, so what's my farmer's name? (Pessi)

I was at a farm in France called ‘Uber eats Farmer league’, then I saw a strange creature called ‘Pessi’. He only appears against farmers.

He ran towards to me, I didn’t know what I should do so I decided to shout “Big games! Big games!“ Pessi scurried away.

MISSING!! MISSING!! 🚨

Name-pionel PESSI Missing: 09/03/2021 vs Madrid Characteristics: Disappearing in big games + Diving + always ranting "give me penalty"

Possible Locations: Penalty Spot, St etienne

Last seen- Alaba’s Pocket

⚠️ ⚠️: don’t walk around with pens

What do tomatoes 🍅 learn to do in a race?

Ketchup!

Q: What is a box's favorite sport?

A: Box-ketball.

Ukraine (🇺🇦) vs Russia (🇷🇺), place your bets!

I asked a man if I was the fastest gun in the west. He said my 17 wasn't good enough. After that, a lot of lead went into his head.

I got two cups of milk. One for me and one for my son.

We both drank them at the same time and tried not to puke. I won, since my son is face first on the table with his blood all over.

As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.