Comparison jokes

What's the difference between a cheater and your mom?

They both cheated!

What are the similarities between an American teen and an old Muslim man?

They both choose who they want.

Roses are red,

My nuts are bigger than your small balls, that's why I get all the bitches.

You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like one!

What's the difference between limbs of babies and a dick?

I've never sucked on dicks.

Okay, boys are known to measure their dicks, but do girls measure their depths?

What's the difference between a retard and a normal person?

A normal person is not named Josh Wakling.

Yo mama is so fat that she's bigger than the cinematic Marvel Universe.

What is the difference between Jesus and the devil?

When the devil came to Earth, he was the one with the nail gun.

Your butt looks so big, it's bigger than Sam Hill.

Your mom's like a candy machine; she pops out for anybody.

What’s the difference between Anne Frank and Harry Potter?

Only one came out of the chamber.

90,900,00,1090,279402% of girls are raped. 67% of women are raped. So I guess girls are sexier than women! Who agrees? Please comment: Good or Bad.

What's the difference between my imaginary friend and God?

None.

They're both imaginary.

You know a baby bottle looks kinda like a penis... Also sausage and hotdogs too.

What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a baby?

Both of their legs don't work.

What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and Rocket League? You can't stand up.

What’s the difference between a teenage girl and a cat? One’s a psycho and the other is a cat.

Q. What's the difference between Trump and a piece of shit? A. Shit isn't orange.

You look as fat as a pig.