Comparison jokes

Your hairline looks like the McDonald's logo.

Your hairline is so bad people thought you were Vegeta!

Your skin's so bright you could be used as a highlighter.

You say this to your friend, "Damn, your nuts are bigger than mine!" *thinks the wrong way*.

Friend: I must order more nuts.

What’s the difference between a dad and a boomerang? The boomerang comes back.

If boys are like sports because they are easy to play, then girls are like a sandwich. They are nice at first, but they're crusty after.

"This dude right here don't look nothing like no damn Tyrese Gibson. He look like a hot, fishy tail termite all dressed in green makeup."

Y yo body built like a half a tooth pic lol.

Imagine me being 12 feet taller than your dad.

Are you dead? Because you look like my dog.

You're so short that you build a tiny house for yourself.

I am like Cookie Monster on steroids when it comes to cookies.

There is a difference between my brother and Stephen Hawking; at least one of them does something.

Tada mun ang hai jiwain taage naal khota bania Honda ae.

I ass big ass you :-)

Me.

The joke is as short as me.

Q. What do Canadian women and Canadian beer have in common? A. They're both stronger than they look.

Water bottles, strong, Standing tall, like sturdy men, Quenching every thirst.

Clear and transparent, Reflecting strength and resolve, Resilient and pure.

In hand, they offer Refreshing relief, like hugs, Soothing every soul.

Water bottles, like men, Nourish and hydrate our lives, Simple yet vital.

What’s the difference between Jesus and the toddler in my basement?

Jesus died a virgin.

Life is like a box of chocolates, they f*cking melt :)