Comparison jokes
Q. What do Canadian women and Canadian beer have in common? A. They're both stronger than they look.
What’s the difference between a man and a margarita?
A margarita hits the spot every time.
What do sharks and people have in common? The great ones are white.
Q: What do nuns and bathrooms have in common?
A: They both have glory holes for pleasing.
Q. What's the difference between Donald Trump and orange Jello?
A. The Jello has a higher IQ.
Water was found on Mars.
Mars: 1 Africa: 0
She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.
I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.
Americans leave without saying goodbye.
Russians say goodbye without leaving.
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A saltshaker.
What does a woman and a hurricane have in common?
They’re nice and wet at first, but in the end they take everything.
Apparently there was a woman from Australia who had sex with 500 men in one day.
That's like a real life "Your mom" joke.
Obese is the N-word for fat people.
What's the difference between a baby and a cooked chicken?
Several hundred calories.
Q. What's the difference between Trump and a piece of shit? A. Shit isn't orange.
Q: What's the difference between a CEO and a beer can?
A: Beer cans don't bleed when they get shot.
Bro, you can't be talking. You built like Barney the dinosaur. Barney is a dinosaur with dinosaur sensation.
Roses are red. Sunflowers are yellow.
Your mom is so fat she looks like a marshmallow.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I thought someone else was ugly, but then I saw you.
Jokes are like Indians.
They never die, they just get reincarnated.
Calling you an idiot would be an insult to stupid people. You're much worse than that.