Comedy jokes
What is the one thing cripples can't do? ... Stand-up comedy.
PP almighty stabeth thy! Then my sister said, "Just put it in."
Q. What do Kenny's dick and this joke have in common?
A. They're both really short.
Emo jokes are not funny, so cut it out.
I was about to say an African joke, but it was too dry.
To the people who have seen "Meet The Fockers" at the movies and they hated it, Fock You, Motherfockers!
Little Johnny walked into class with a black eye, and the teacher said, "Why do you have a black eye?"
Johnny said, "Well, me and my parents have to share a bed, and my dad asked me if I was asleep and I said no, so he smacked me."
The teacher said, "Well tonight, don't say anything."
The next day, Johnny walked in with another black eye, and the teacher said, "Why do you have another black eye?" Little Johnny said, "Well, last night, I did what you said and didn't say anything when my dad asked me if I was asleep. A few minutes later, my dad said he was coming, and my mom said she was coming too. They usually don't go anywhere without me so I said 'Wait for me, I'm coming too.'"
I've tried to like all of your jokes. They are funny 😆 and joshisboss, you are awesome. Keep up the good work 👍!
I told a chemistry joke once.
There was no reaction.
What do you call an Eskimo stripper?
A frosty-tute.
What do you call Peg and Cat from Peg + Cat? Egg + splat.
Eggy joke for all to enjoy!
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent!
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer. It never gets old.
"Man, your jokes about homicide are totally killer!"
What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke? Timing.
Three blonde sisters die and are told by an angel that in order for them to go to heaven they have to pass all 100 steps. But each step has a joke, each joke gets funnier and funnier. And in order to pass them all, you can't laugh at any joke or else you go to hell. The blonde girls accept the offer.
So the angel begins telling them the jokes. One of the girls laughs at the 3rd step. The second blonde laughs halfway there. Finally, the last blonde was at the 100th step. The angel said, "This is the last step. If you laugh you will go straight to hell with your sisters and if you don't you can pass." The blonde agrees and the angel starts to tell the joke, "What do you ca..." Out of nowhere the blonde starts bursting out laughing. "Why are you laughing? I haven't even finished the joke yet!" The blonde replies, "I just got the first joke!"
POV you are drunk and telling jokes and no one is listening 😭😭😭
In Australia, my jokes are high koala-ty.
I'd tell you a 9/11 joke, but it'd fly over your head and into the Twin Towers.
In India, 3 things are wide and far everywhere, but no one admits: racism, sexism, and Sunny's jism.