Comedy jokes
Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.
Why did the banana like the movie?
Because it was apeeling.
Welcome to our Computer Show.
I'm Mars Argo.
Welcome to youtube.com.
Communist jokes aren't funny unless everyone gets them.
Alyas' dad died, that's comedy. Something not funny is like BLM.
This is a joke to tell to someone with you or something. SOMEONE will laugh. Say: "This word isn't gonna be funny until I tell you, your probably not going to laugh." *your friend* "what's the word?" *you* "finger" *friend* *dies of laughter*. *note* it works better if you wiggle your finger or something before and not everyone laughs, so don't feel bad if they don't. Also, don't be surprised if you get put in jail for murder, because you're going to kill someone with this.
A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a coma. After 6 months, she woke up. She asked the doctor, "How's the baby?"
"You had twins," the doctor replied. "Your brother named them."
The woman said, "Oh no, not my brother! What did he call them?"
The doctor said, "He called the girl Denise."
"What about the boy?" the woman asked.
The doctor said, "Denephew."
Nah c'mon guys, we don't let jokes like this fly around here.
The world is a freaking rape joke.
What's wrong with airline food...! They're not black, and they're not people. hahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhahahahXD!!!!!!!!! You're welcome?
What do ya call a legless prostitute in a strawberry field?
A jammy cunt.
"Knock knock!"
"Who's there?"
"Baby!"
"Baby who?"
"Do you want to eat this baby that I have prepared?"
"No thanks, I already ate."
What do you say to a girl with two black eyes?
Nothing, you told her twice.
You know some of these jokes took me 9 minutes and 11 seconds to realize. When I did, it hit me like a plane.
What do you call an emo kid's suicide live stream?
America's funniest home videos.
Why does this category seem to have the most retold and recycled jokes on this website?
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
Home Alone.
- The emo went to give the tree a high five, but the emo was left hanging.
- How did the gay person die? Homicide.
- Why did the emo get kicked out of the amusement park? He was cutting in line.
- When does a joke turn into a dad joke? When it leaves and never comes back.
- I cried when my dad chopped onions. Onions was such a good dog.
- I have happy memories building sandcastles with my dad, until my mom took his urn away.
- How is the person over there different from cancer? His dad didn't beat cancer.
Why do dwarfs do drugs?
To get high.
Why are there so many jokes about Chuck Norris, but not about Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee was no joking matter.