Clothing jokes
Why do mermaids wear seashells?
They are too big for “B” shells, and too small for “D” shells.
Why did the sperm cross the road?
Because I put the wrong socks on this morning.
What do you call a belt with a watch on it?
A waist of time!
What do lady dogs (bitches) wear to work?
Pant suits.
Why do orphans like belts?
They remind them of their father.
Power Puff Girls be like :
If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, does that mean your pants are tucked into your shirt?
My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets."
What do you say to toast with bad shoes?
"Butter those."
Son: Dad, I need a new butt.
Dad: Why, son?
Son: Because mine has a huge crack in it.
Hi, I like emos because they are black.
I gave my friends some buttons.
Too bad he couldn't pull himself together.
A note for my History Teacher:
Frick frack apple jack tic tac sick sack Mr. Khan and give him a big fat whack 'cause his teaching's got lack, his system I will hack and through the screen I'll give him a smack. I'll throw him on the clothing rack. On his seat I'll put thumb tacks, I'll break his momma's back... and he'll never come back.
Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?
In case he gets a hole in one.
What do sped gymnasts wear?
A Reotard.
My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch! I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and Air Force Ones, but as soon as I spend $100 on hookers, she leaves me.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.
You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like one!
I saw a man today wearing a t-shirt that said "I'm with stupid."
I told him, "You know, that's not very nice."
He looked at me and said, "I'm with stupid, too."
What's worse than having ants in your pants?
Uncles.
Look at my name and you'll see the joke (read it out loud).