Christmas jokes
What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, they haven't got family.
Why did little sally fall off the swings?
Because she had no arms.
What did sally get for Christmas?
Gloves! Only joking...she still hasn’t opened the box.
What might an aborted child want for Christmas?
..... a home that isn't a bin.
What do Christmas lights and Jeffrey Epstein have in common?
They don’t hang themselves.
What type of alphabet does an elf learn?
The elf-abet.
Joe Momma so fat when Santa came down the chimney he said, "Ho, ho, holy crap!"
Yo mama is so ugly that when Santa came to the house and saw a picture of her, he died.
Why can't orphans have a Christmas list? Because they can't give it to their parents to tell Santa.
What did the orphan want for Christmas?
Parents.
Why was Santa happy?
'Cause he has hoes.
What do you call a green boner? The Grinch.
What did the deaf, blind, mute, and paralyzed baby get for Christmas?
AIDS.
What does a stuttering Santa call Mrs. Claus?
A hoe hoe hoe.
Why didn't the boy like his Christmas presents? Hint: They were a soccer ball, bicycle, and running shoes.
Why was Santa happy?
Because he had 3 hoes.
Little Johnny woke up at midnight on Christmas Eve to Santa with his pants down on top of his mom. He then said, "Ho ho OH YEAH!!!"
Why was Stephen Hawking disappointed when he got his Christmas present? It was singing lessons.
What’s the difference between Santa and an orphan? Nothing; they don’t have parents.
So I got my son a trampoline for Christmas this year, and he was so ungrateful, like he just sat there crying in his wheelchair. What has this world come to?
What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?
Cancer.