Chocolate jokes
Chuck Norris can make an omelet from Kinder surprise.
What do you call a bunch of Paki's jumping off a cliff?
Chocolate drops.
I hate this. Everybody knows it's how I roll, if you jump into my van you get a Tootsie Roll. My uncle said this...
Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."
I have a pun, but I will nut tell you!
Memes
What is the opposite of a lady finger?
Answer: Mentos.
Why did Michael Jackson love melted chocolate? Because he could pour it on his cock, then get a prepubescent boy to suck it off.
What's a homeless person's favorite cookie?
Pooreos.
What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Home made cookies ;)
Oompa Loompa Doobity doo, I got a glock and it’s pointing at you.
Why did the M&M go to school?
It wanted to be a Smartie.
What’s the difference between chocolate and people?
You can’t buy people nowadays.
Why do trans women go by she/her?
Because if they went by her/she, they'd be Hershey's.
What is a necrophiliac's favorite candy? A Hearsey's Kiss.
Little Johnny walked into an ice cream shop and asked: "Do you have chocolate filled ice cream?"
The man replies: "We are out of that, sorry, we are almost out of every single flavor, do you want me to get you a vanilla filled one?"
Johnny replies: "Sure."
After that, the man asks for Johnny's phone and goes to back of the store. 5 minutes later, the man comes with an ice cream and Johnny's phone.
Johnny asks: "How much for the ice cream?"
The man replies: "Nothing, it's on the house."
After Johnny ate his delicious ice cream, he searched for his watch history. And then Johnny realized the flavor of the ice cream.
What is a spaceman’s favorite chocolate?
A Mars bar!
Guy: Why can't Jesus have M&M's?
Priest: Why?
Guy: Because they'll fall through the hole in his hands.
Bill really said "your body, my choice," like, my man, it's your body, MY choice.
Your forehead so big you got to take Tylenol pills, big like chocolate chip cookies.
What did Sally get for Easter?..
Nail polish.