children's jokes
Q: What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A: A bus full of children.
What's red, takes my belt, and what I got from a weird children's house?
An orphan.
A priest and Rabbi run out of the orphanage.
Priest: "How the hell did that fire start?"
Rabbi: "I don't know, but what about the children?"
Priest: "Fuck the children."
Rabbi: "Do we have time?"
Priest: "There's always time for something like that."
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.
My kids are so ungrateful. I got them a new dishwasher and they just won't stop complaining about their mom.
What's yellow but can't swim?
A bus full of children.
I was walking home when I saw children crossing the street on their own. I went towards him and tapped his shoulder and said, "Hey, little kid, you are not supposed to be walking on your own." The kid turns out to be a dwarf.
Why do priests perform baptisms? So they can see children wet.
A priest and a rabbi run out of a burning church, and the priest says, "What about the children?" The rabbi says, "Fuck the children." And the priest says, "Do you think we'll have time?"
Did you hear about Johnny Depp's shelter for abused women? It's going as well as Michael Jackson's children's hospital!
Not many people know this, but Soulja Boy was the lead role in a very successful children's movie a while ago. Released to theaters nationwide in 2006 was Honey, I Crunked the Kids.
Once, a mother worked in an orphanage as a cooker. She had a son and a daughter—twins.
When she was going to her work, she decided to take the twins with her. They were happy, they got ready and played with other children while their mother was cooking for other kids. Then, a poor family entered the orphanage. They said they wanted to adopt twins. As soon as they saw the children playing, they noticed the woman's kids. They said they wanted to adopt them. The manager said they weren't orphans, but before he said it, a teacher accidentally gave them to the poor family under the names of Layla and Logan. The kids were Kyle and Kayla. They went away with their new children, but the kids cried, they said they weren't orphans and that their mother was in the orphanage, cooking. The poor family didn't believe, they thought it was the children's reaction of getting adopted. The woman went outside of the kitchen, she didn't see her children. She asked the teacher... And when she found out, she screamed and ran outside. She was running at the poor family, when they thought she was a psychopath and wanted to kill them.
When Kyle and Kayla looked back, they saw their mother. They swung their hands so the poor family could let them away. They ran to their mother and hugged her. The poor family got shocked and called the cops. But the mother, she showed the documents and her parent rights. This all explains the worst joke, "Yo Momma Lost Ya."
Alle Kinder heißen Rune, außer einer: Fisse.
What's yellow all over and can't swim?
A school bus full of children.
No matter how kind you are, German children are kinder.
What’s yellow and can’t swim? A bus full of children.
Obama, Trump, and Clinton are on the Titanic. The ship hits the iceberg and is going down.
Obama: "This is terrible! We've got to do something -- save the women and children!"
Trump: "Screw the women and children!"
Clinton: "Do you think we have time...?"
What do priests give children?
Syphilis.
My husband and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What does a priest and a clown have in common?
They both make children cry.