children's jokes
One day, I was walking through a park when I realized it was crowded.
To this day, I still don't know who let the children out of my basement.
Jack and Molly are sitting in school one day. Molly is asleep when the teacher asks her a question, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?”
Jack sees Molly is sleeping and quickly pokes her with a sharp pencil.
“Jesus Christ almighty!” shouts Molly.
“Correct,” says the teacher.
The next day the teacher asks, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?”
Molly is again asleep and is poked by Jack’s pencil.
“Jesus Christ almighty!” she shouts.
“Correct again,” says the teacher.
The next day, for a 3rd time, Molly is asleep.
This time the teacher asks her, “What did Eve say to Adam when she had so many children?”
Jack pokes Molly with the pencil again, and this time Molly screams “If you stick that thing in me one more time I’m going to crack it in half!”
The teacher fainted.
What do you call children born from incest?
Gross Domestic Product.
Dad: Honey!
Mom: What?
Dad: All of the broken condoms are on the bed.
Mom: WHAT!?
Children: *staring*
So yesterday, I was at an orphanage, harassing children by twerking at them.
They burst into tears.
I was worried that they would call their mom, well... um... I got away.
Rape is no laughing matter. The reason why women are not believed in rape is because of you mother fucking shitbirds with no future who will become drunkards and drug dealers who go broke and live on the street getting hit by a fucking car. Fuck all of you sadists who think this kind of shit is funny, well shut the fuck up. Go jump off a bridge or get hit by car and I hope you fucking sickos die.
Stop rape. Stop rappe. Stop rapibg innocent children and women and men. I am done with rape. I am done with it!
What does an Xbox/PlayStation and Michael Jackson have in common?
Kids turn them on.
Johnny is walking along, and a priest is coming the other way. Johnny says, "Hey, mister, why are you wearing your collar backwards?"
The priest says, "Because I'm a father."
Johnny says, "Yeah? Well, my old man's got three kids, and he don't wear his collar backwards."
The priest says, "You don't understand, son. I have thousands of children."
Johnny says, "You should wear your fuckin' trousers backwards."
He is looking for children. If you don't know who EDP445 is, look him up.
Be careful around EDP445.
Ukraine be like dead children...
RUSSIA BE LIKE DEAD GENERALS!
"Kidnapping is just surprise adoption, congrats! You are now all my children! Just hop into the portal that leads to the Lust Ring in Hell!"
How are orphans and blind kids similar?
They both have never seen their parents :)
Children and your meat are actually quite similar.
At first you seem weirded out by spanking it, but later on you start to enjoy it.
Orphans are just wannabe children. They want a family.
How many children can you fit in a box?
Maybe five if you have a trash compactor.
My wife and I have made a difficult choice and have decided we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
Why do Asians abandon their children?
They're bad at math.
An African man was walking in New York when he saw a sign that said, "Watch out for children."
He started laughing hysterically, then a white man asked him, "Why are you laughing?"
He said, "In Africa, they would never put up a sign like that."
Dark humor is like cancer, it's funnier when children get it.
Ejaculated in her braces, call that children behind bars.