Children jokes
Why did the pirate kids ride the short bus to school?
Because they were retarrrrrrrrrded.
Why do orphans love foster homes?
Because they actually have a home.
Why do my kids die?
Stinky Oussy :D
"Emmy and Thomas sitting in a tree."
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he doesn't know where home is.
So, there was a kid named Bobby, and he was writing notes. He asked his mother, who was on a phone call, "what is one plus one?" She said, "I HATE YOU." Then he asked his brother what is 2 + 2, who was watching a Batman movie, said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" Then he asked his dad what is 4 plus 4, who was playing football, said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he asked his sister 8+8, (she was playing with barbies), and she said, "My buns are burning." Then he went to school and told her teacher the first note he wrote down. The teacher sent him to the principal’s office. The principal yelled, "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!" Bobby said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" The principal yelled, "HOW MANY SPANKINGS DO YOU WANT?!" Then he said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he walked away from the principal’s office and said, "my buns are burning."
Why don’t orphans play the game of hide-and-seek?
They won’t be found because no one will look for them.
Welcome to Jimmy's orphanage and pizza shop, where today's loss is a sauce. How may I help you?
Orphans: Where are my parents?
Random person: In the bed.
The orphans all died!!!
Oh wait, no one cares...
Their parents are all dead anyway. We are just making them happier. They get to join their parents in hell.
Bad joke: Why is it easy to bully orphans? Because what are they going to do, tell their parents?
What did the kids say hi to? A slide.
"What do you want to eat?"
"You choose."
"Children."
"What?"
*Picks up pot*
"You said anything!"
Why can’t Helen Keller have kids?
Answer: She’s dead.
What do birds and children have in common?
If you shoot them, they die.
My wife and children are leaving me over my obsession with horse racing.
And they're off!
A father is talking to his three kids.
Kid 1: Why is my name Rose?
Dad: Because when you were a kid, a rose fell on your head.
Kid 2: Why is my name Lily?
Dad: Because a lily fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 3: Auughhghhhggghhh!
Dad: Oh hey, Brick.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What does a turtle and a pedophile have in common? They both want to get there before the hare does.
What do you call a bus full of kids? A killstreak.