Children jokes
What is the thing that orphans miss the most?
Their parents.
I'm sorry, orphans, that you're getting bullied. Oh, I have to go, my MOM's calling me. We're going on a road trip to go to a FAMILY reunion!
Three children play hide and seek. Their names are Silence, Anger, and Parent. Anger counts. Parent hides in the trash. Silence is at the police station.
A policeman looks at Silence and asks: "What is your name?" Silence replies: "Silence." Terrified, the policeman asks: "Where are your parents?" Silence then replies: "Parent is in the trash!" The policeman then asks indignantly: "Are you looking for Trouble?" Silence replies: "No, in fact, Anger finds me."
I talk about the girls in my math class simping over anime characters and making random ships as well as for Miraculous Ladybug children's show, whatever the show is called, but it's a kids show. 💀 Now they’re searching up pictures of Tom Holland laughing in their absolute weirdness.
I like Tom Holland, but these kids man, they like him like they’re in a relationship. They might as well start kissing and licking the screen. They’re probably writing fanfictions in their free time when they aren’t searching up kids show characters, anime characters, and Tom Holland pics on their SCHOOL CHROMEBOOK. Their only device choice was a school-provided laptop which is monitored by the school while they are writing fan fictions on Google Docs and searching up some weird Tom Holland stuff. Imagine how Tom Holland would feel if he found out that there are 11 year old girls searching up some weird stuff about him.
Police arrested two kids yesterday. One was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one, and let the other one off.
How do adults like their cookies like their orphans?
Homemade.
What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?
They both got a 10% survival rate...
Dad: "I'm giving all your toys to the orphanage."
Kid: "Why are you doing that?"
Dad: "So you won't get bored there."
What does a man with 20 children do now?
Now he eats sausages even with cellophane.
Why does Michael Jackson like to shop at Walmart?
Little boys' pants are half off!
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
For this orphan, his dad didn't only go and get the milk. His mom did too.
What's the one good thing about pedophiles? They slow down near schoolzones.
What happens when you combine candy and dick? That creepy guy down the street!
What's orphans' favorite game? Housekeeping.
How do terrorists feed their children?
"Here comes the aeroplane!"
"And here comes the second one!"
what's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? the trampoline doesn't cave in when i jump on it.
My grandpa may be a pedo, but at least he slows down in the school car park.
Grandpa: "You can't have phones within 15 feet of the table."
Me: "And you aren't allowed within 100 feet of the elementary school."
KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."