Children jokes
Roses are red, bow down to your master, children are fast, but I am faster.
My wife and children are leaving me over my obsession with horse racing.
And they're off!
The dark side of kid songs:
You got a friend in me... you got a friend in me!
Why can't orphans play video games?
Because they don't have their parent's email.
What's the difference between onions and children? Nothing, when you cut one everyone around you cries.
Memes
Guys, this has to stop. Let's tell their parents. Oh wait...
Why do orphans never get 5 stars in GTA 5? Because they are not wanted!
Do you know what dogs and orphans don't have in common?
Dogs get loved.
Why do Orphans like school?
Because they don't have a home to go back to afterwards.
"Rock-a-bye baby on the treetop, When the wind blows, the baby will drop. Then the baby will lay on the ground, Not moving a muscle, not making a sound."
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty was an egg?
What’s the difference between a dog and parents?
If an orphan calls their name, only the dog comes back.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't get a home run.
What did the parents say to the orphan? "Where are your parents?"
Oh... wait.
Someone locked me out of my house today... At least the children in my basement aren't my problem anymore.
Why do orphans play Minecraft? Because they have no home.
Why are orphans not allowed in stores?
Because else they would actually feel at home.
How did the orphan operate the phone? He didn't. He didn't understand the homepage.
What's the difference between a shopping bag and Michael Jackson?
One is white, made of plastic, and dangerous for children. The other is for groceries.
What do a plastic bag and Jeffery Epstein have in common?
They're both dangerous to children.