Children jokes
Why can’t orphans have phones?
Because it has a home button!
Why can't orphans have cookies?
They are home made.
What is the difference between a dog pound and an orphanage?
In a dog pound, people actually want them.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Why don’t orphans live in villages?
Because they will get abandoned.
How are orphans like broken pencils?
Neither of them have points.
Why is Santa's sack so big?
Because he comes once a year.
I live next to a kindergarten, and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it's me who has a drill around little children.
Why are orphans not allowed in stores?
Because else they would actually feel at home.
1, 2 buckle my shoe.
3, 4 buckle some more.
5, 6 Nike kicks.
1, 2 buckle my shoe.
3, 4 open the door.
5, 6 Nike kicks.
What do babies and explosives have in common?
They both make a noise when you throw them.
What do a plastic bag and Jeffery Epstein have in common?
They're both dangerous to children.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
Stop with the dead baby jokes. We're running out of babies.
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A bus full of children.
Q: What's the difference between me and a priest? A: A priest isn't turned on by dead children.
New skin unlocked: Blood splatter!
(Obtained by running over 69 children.)
How old are 9/11 victims?
"There, toddlers, here come the airplane!"
What is a geographical discovery? Little Johnny found his geography homework undone.
Ring.. Ring.. Yes this is Dave from the Orphanage, "you make 'em we take 'em", how may I be of service?