Children jokes
What are two things that an orphan can’t have?
Two parents.
Me: Hey, are your parents here?
Orphan: (crying) STOP CALLING HERE!
Wife: “I want another baby.”
Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”
What do 7 year old girls want?
To be ate!
I’m about to go to the orphanage to say yo mama jokes.
I'm making a website for orphans. [I] won't add the home page.
What film do orphans hate?
"Instant Family."
Why do shows have a family? Because they are "Pair-rents"!
What does a man with 20 children do now?
Now he eats sausages even with cellophane.
What do orphans not see on a controller?
The home button.
What's the food orphans can't eat?
Family-sized ice cream.
What's the same about boxes and children?
They're both found in basements.
I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedophile have in common?
"Are you ready kids?"
What do priests give children?
Syphilis.
Bill Clinton and Joe Biden are on a sinking ship.
Joe Biden says we need to save the women and children. Bill Clinton says, "Screw the women and children." Joe Biden says, "Do we have that much time?"
Why is it wrong to drive around in a van offering children candy?
Because you’ll have more success if you give out video games!
One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Claus,
"Please send me a sibling!"
Santa Claus wrote him back and said, "Okay, send me your mother!"
My husband and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
I was asked to design a website for an orphanage, so I decided to design it without the home page.