Children jokes
Why don't orphans get dad jokes?
Because they don't have a dad to tell them.
What movie do orphans relate to the most?
- Home Alone
Why do orphans have no sense of humor?
I guess they've never heard a dad joke.
Your children grew up faster than it took you to leave for the milk.
What do orphans' parents have in common with Nemo?
They both can’t be found.
Planes shouldn't have free Wi-Fi. Why? Because the last time they had free Wi-Fi, well here's what happened...
On September eleventh 2001, (children scream).
I'd like to have kids one day.
I don't think I could stand them any longer than that, though.
What do you call gay parents?
Poly.
Good Lord, any tips on how to kidnap children? I say, "Free candy," and they run.
Why are orphans unable to work at S.C. Johnson?
Because it’s a family business.
Me: "Cya"
Mom: "Where ya going?"
Me: "The orphanage to make yo mama jokes."
Mum: ...
What is the difference between an orphan and a non-orphan? You can slap the orphan, but not the non-orphan because they can actually tell their parents.
I saw an orphan on the road. I asked him if he's an orphan. The kid says, "Yeah, what gave it away?"
I say, "Your parents."
I try and try every day, but 5 keep coming out. There's so money at this point my walls are built of babies.
What does a man with 20 children do now?
Now he eats sausages even with cellophane.
What do orphans, parents, and Nemo have in common?
Neither can be found.
What company do orphans hate the most?
S. C. Johnson, a family company.
What do you get when you have a class of kids and a speeding car?
A 24 killstreak!
Why doesn't the orphan's phone have a homepage, being it doesn't have a home?
What is a kid's favorite thing to do with their dad?
Play pretend dog in the bed.