Children jokes
"Rock-a-bye baby on the treetop, When the wind blows, the baby will drop. Then the baby will lay on the ground, Not moving a muscle, not making a sound."
What’s the difference between a dog and parents?
If an orphan calls their name, only the dog comes back.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't get a home run.
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty was an egg?
Orphans: Where are my parents?
Random person: In the bed.
What's the one upside to being an orphan?
You never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.
Why do orphans play Minecraft? Because they have no home.
Why are orphans not allowed in stores?
Because else they would actually feel at home.
Me and my friends jumped some orphans. Who will they tell? Their parents?
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
Stop with the dead baby jokes. We're running out of babies.
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A bus full of children.
Q: What's the difference between me and a priest? A: A priest isn't turned on by dead children.
I drove through a school zone and found out you can drag a speed bump 😬.
So I saw a bag full of children near a dumpster. I guess we know where the orphans are when the parents didn’t want them.
Wouldn’t want to hope a Catholic priest comes along, otherwise the priest will have new sex toys.
Why did Michael Jackson divorce LMP? She didn't want to give him kids.
What's the difference between an orphan's parents and his boomerang?
One of them actually came back.
People should build orphanages next to graveyards so at least orphans can see their parents.
Little Sally comes home from school one day and says to her mom, "Mommy, mommy, you won’t believe it! Little Johnny just pulled out his PP in class." The mother responded, "Well, what did it look like?" Sally said, "It looks like a peanut." The mother said, "Oh, it was small." "No, it was salty," said Sally.
Farrah Fawcett, upon arriving at the pearly gates, God asked her, for having led such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe.
Five hours later, Michael Jackson died.