Child jokes
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can't find the home plate.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair?
TIMMAHHHH!
What is an orphan’s least favorite children’s game?
House.
What cookie has an orphan never had?
Homemade.
Mum finds out child cheats in math test.
Mom says, "There is no cheating in this house."
Child: "Then why did you cheat with my math teacher last night?"
Memes
POV: That one kid tryna wink
What do you call a parent that is pregnant?
Buy one, get one free.
When I'm chilling and a little kid ruins my moment.
You learn from mistakes!
That's why you're an only child!
Do you want to know my motto when I’m bored?
Punch an orphan, who is he going to tell, his mom?
Why was the orphan stupid?
Because his parents couldn't guide him.
Q: Why was the 4 year old anti-vaxer crying?
A: He was in a mid-life crisis.
Me explaining my child: when your mom is sitting on a table during her period, it's called the periodic table.
Why did the orphan sit alone in the corner?
They wanted some family time.
What do you call a rich Chinese child?
"Ching Ching..."
Where do babies get baptized?
So the priest can wash their sex toys.
My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once.
What song do supportive parents of a closeted child love?
“The Son Will Come Out Tomorrow.”
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can’t get a home run.
Kid: What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher: What?
Kid: Fruity Pebbles with water.
Teacher: Why water?
Kid: 'Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
What if Game of Thrones and Harry Potter antagonism had a child?
Coldemort!